#but yeah I personally just need fic about ace characters to be more reflective of my experience

[pizzaqueen]

Oh and I started writing the ace!Eddie fic I mentioned the other week. I have the first part drafted and it could stand on its own but it would be very bittersweet and that’s not entirely my jam, so I’ve planned a second part and need at least a third.

I’m just trying to reconcile how I usually write Steve with the Steve I want in this fic (sexual compatibility is very important to me so he’s not how I usually see Steve for that to work) and I’m not 100% I can make it feel right to me but fingers crossed!

[peachpety]

Upon reflecting this past year, I’m reminded of one area as a fandom citizen that i am lacking - reading fic. And so was born an idea to canvas my fandom family and friends to share with me a fic they've written, art they've created, a podfic they've recorded in 2023 of which they are most proud.

This two part 'rec yourself' list is the result.

Part One features Drarry creations (heavily featured since that's my OTP). Part Two (here) includes a kick-ass mix of various HP ships and ships from other fandoms, including Carry On, Check Please!, Good Omens, Teen Wolf, and Stranger Things. Also, and most importantly, each entry presents a smol blurb from the creator about why they chose their particular piece as their 2023 favorite.

For ease in reading, I've also placed all submitted works posted to AO3 into a filterable bookmark collection, Rec Yourself 2023. Be aware that there's a range of ratings and archive/creator tags, so please, take appropriate responsibility for your personal consumption. And please also be sure to shower the creators with kudos and lovely comments.

Y'all. This endeavor has been a fucking blast. One thing's for sure, I am blessed, humbled and honored to know a whole bunch of fantastic, brilliant, fun folks. Big love to you all, and thank you for participating.

So go forth. Indulge and enjoy! xo peach

* * *

✩ @pato-roldnart ✩ Quiet as a mouse HP | Viktor Krum x Ron Weasely | ART | G rating | Unleashed!Fest 2023 I'm quite proud of this one, I don't know how I made it, I had never drawn them before! My mind went full "oh yeah ronvik " Also, I like the idea of them bonding over their pets and Ron seeing that Viktor cares about something else that is not Quidditch.

✩ @tontonguetonks ✩ Coffee and a Croissant HP Next Gen | Scorpius x Albus | 903 FIC | G rating There are parts of myself and my lived experience in every story and character I write—how I socialize, how I take my coffee… I can’t help it. In *Coffee and a Croissant*, I put a lot of myself in my ace and autistic Albus. He is very dear to me in this story, and in my Fizzy Lifting Drinks drabble. The fic is just a toe-dip in the Soulmate waters where Albus grapples with what to do if he is someone’s Soulmate, but they’re not his. Parts 2 and 3 are in the works, but there is no timeline on either of them. Maybe in 2024?

✩ @crazybutgood ✩ I Bloom Pink For You HP | Narcissa Malfoy x Pansy Parkinson | 993 FIC + ORIGAMI COMIC | M rating | HP Bodice Ripper Fest 2023 This whole idea came about because I got so excited to fold a corset for hp bodice ripper fest, realised I couldn't just submit that one thing, and started brainstorming more loose ideas. It all clicked together when I was inspired by a fic by @schmem14, whose writing I adore. I was so grateful and even more excited when Em gave permission to make this. From there started the self-indulgent process of folding fancy things with fancier papers for this origami comic, and I couldn't have done it without Em and my lovely support team.

✩ @seekercass ✩ Something Cosmic HP | Cedric x Draco x Harry | 1.7k FIC | M rating | Polyship Week 2022 A self-rec that I am still extremely proud of is a short fic written for Polyshipping Week 2022 called Something Cosmic. It's a small coda to Something Good to Always Keep, another fic that I wrote for Quidditch Fest 2021 that I cherish very much. Even though writing is still hard for me these days, I often think about this 'verse and what life is like for Harry, Draco and Cedric after they graduated from Oxford. These three and slice of life bring me such joy. I hope to write more of them.

✩ @roseharpermaxwell ✩ Sounds Worth It HP | Hermione x Draco | 5k FIC | T rating | D/Hr Advent 2023 Being nominated for d/hr advent was a sweet surprise. It gave me a good excuse to remember how to write and the nudge I needed to create something this year.

✩ @basicallyahedgehog ✩ (They) Keep Me Warm HP | Hermione x Harry x Ron | 5.8k FIC | E rating | HP Trans Fest 2023 This was my transfest fic - I wrote it as a love letter to all my trans and Enby friends and as a way of processing some of my own feelings. It’s my first (and so far only) foray into poly golden trio and I loved playing with their dynamics with that added layer to their relationship.

✩ @lumosatnight ✩ For I Have Found Salvation HP | Harry x Severus | 7.1k FIC | E rating | Snarry AUctoberfest 2023 Although this is a smut fic at its core, I tried really hard to make the pacing flow, bringing in background characters, and creating memorable imagery. I am very proud of how it turned out. However, this is probably my favorite fic from 2023 simply for the fact that I had the most fun writing it!

✩ @sugareey-makes-stuff ✩ Feel You Breathing Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 8.4k TEXTING FIC | E rating | 2023 Year of the OTP This is my fav 2023 piece because I learned how to create a custom text message AO3 skin, stylize things for plain text reading, and I wrote a whole story  that had some plot that was told through text messages. Also, I did not know I could achieve so much spiciness and throw in so many bad pick-up lines through this medium, but hey, the more you know! XD

✩ @schmem14 ✩ Mastermind HP | Harry x Ron; Draco x Harry; Ron x Draco | 10.7k FIC | E rating | Dronarry Fest 2023 This is one of the few times a story just flew out of me. Possessive stalker Draco sets out to win over Ron in this creepy thriller, but there’s a catch: Ron is already in love with Draco’s boyfriend, Harry.

✩ @drwhoisginnyholmes & @fledglinger ✩ Not Bad, For A 6000 Year Old Classic! Good Omens | Aziraphale x Crowley | 11.8k FIC + ART | E rating | DIWS Reverse! Reverse! Mini Bang

✩ @sniperjade ✩ The Sounds of Us HP Marauders | Regulus x Remus | 20.4k FIC | M rating | Remus Lupin Fest 2023; HPFC Spring Fling 2023 I've been thinking about this for a couple of days and whilst I would really love to say it was the drarry I wrote for this fest last year my favourite would have to be this moonseeker I wrote for Remus Lupin Fest last year. It's my favourite because I lived this fic. It became the entirety of my personality for a whole month because I desperately needed to get to the chapter where Regulus was riding on Padfoots back, through the forbidden forest, with only the light of the full moon to guide them, just to try and help Remus. It's also just because it's very musical and I'm very musical so that makes me love it all the more.

✩ @ghaniblue ✩ Sleeping With Ghosts HP | Regulus x Draco x Harry | 21.9k FIC | M rating | Harry Potter Rare Pair Fest IV I posted a Regulus/Harry/Draco fic last month that I'm very fond of. I started writing it more than 1 1/2 years ago, before I ever read a single Regulus fic. It's triad fic, and I'm pretty proud of the way the individual relationships develop. That was important to me, and I think I succeeded. Posting the first fic on ao3 with this triad tag doesn't hurt either.

✩ @celilasart & @wolfspurr ✩ Shifted Teen Wolf | Derek Hale x Stiles Stilinski | 25k FIC + ART | T rating | Sterek Reverse Bang This work was created for sterek reverse bang, a collaboration fest where the artists create first and the writers write second. wolfspurr and I just clicked when we talked about my art and the things that it inspired in their writer brain ;D the result is just an amazingly sweet and wholesome fic, that is still set in the teenwolf universe as we know it. but unlike many other fics which are full of violence and danger, this one starts with a bang and then it is a beautifully woven story of two people who just complete each other. also... the working title for my art was: tiny fox & sour wolf.

✩ @orange-peony ✩ At the speed of light Carry On | Basilton Pitch x Simon Snow | 26.3k FIC | E rating I picked [this fic] because I had a lot of fun writing it! It started off as a drabble and ended up 26k because I just had a blast writing it and the fandom support was so lovely. Last but not least, Pato made an absolutely stunning art piece for this fic, and it was the best present ever.

✩ @wynnyfryd ✩ i don’t know, you figure it out Stranger Things | Steve Harrington x Eddie Munson | 35.4k WIP FIC | E rating bragging about yourself is difficult, but i’ll just say it’s my favorite because i’m proud of myself for sticking to one project for this long, i love all the artwork the fic has inspired, and i just think the line “the river styx must taste like pennies” fucks severely lmao.

✩ @decaflondonfog ✩ growing pains Check Please! | Eric Bittle x Kent Parson | 50k FIC | T rating i am not usually a long fic gal, which i think is in part lack of patience, but also how attached i get to a universe if i’m working on it for a longer period of time. i finished writing this back in june but this fic felt very “me” in many ways and i think about them so often still  so it’s definitely my 2023 creation i’m proudest of!

[quartermera]

Forehead and Cheek Kisses with Bonney

♢ : Forehead or cheek kisses

This girl kisses you all the damn time! Bonney is a very energetic person imo and it’s reflected in the way she behaves around you. Whenever you’re around, she’ll seek your attention, and if that means pecking your cheek then so be it!

You actually love it because that means she covers you in them haha!

She has a really cute habit of pouting if you don’t kiss her back or don’t give her enough attention after she’s pecked you. Don’t let her wait too long or too often though or she will get mad haha! But worry not, a smile and a kiss is all you need to give her to be forgiven.

Bonney is really chill about PDA. She gives zero fucks about people looking at you. On the contrary, I think she kinda likes it? It’s pretty much a way for her to flex like hell yeah! I have an amazing girlfriend and she’s mine!!!

If anyone tries to hit on you... oh boy, pray for their soul. She’ll start nicely, moving closer to you, wrapping an arm around your middle, kiss your cheek. If they don’t get the message, she’ll start calling you pet names, maybe talk about last night with a suggestive tone (even if in reality you spent the night cuddling) etc. If they still don’t get that they should back the fuck off, she’ll get mad and tbh she can be really scary.

“Stop talking to my girlfriend! She’s too good for you anyway! If you look at her one more time I’ll blow your brains out and eat them for dinner!”

In these moments, the only thing that can calm her is you and you better do if you don’t want for it to end in a bloodbath.

In private she’s generally also quite energetic but she’s also a huge softie for you, ngl. She’s energetic in a different way, as in she spends all her energy on you. She wants to have lots of quality time together and if for you that involves cuddling in bed while regularly exchanging little kisses, that’s fine by her.

It’s mostly all about cheek kisses usually. But if you brush some hair away from her forehead before gently pecking it, I swear to heavens she’ll look at you like you’re the most beautiful creature in the whole world <3

*screams into oblivion* oKaY, Anon! I didn’t expect a request for Bonney but I’m REALLY happy I got one bc bich I lover too ;-; <3 I’ll explain why more under the cut bc I don’t wanna spam here, but thank you a lot for your request <3 I hope you liked what I came up with for her! In any case, I’m very happy to conclude this event with her!

Nonsexual Acts of Intimacy Prompt List

This signs the end of the 2021 Event! I hope you enjoyed it, I’ll write a conclusion post tomorrow once I’ve slept, see ya then!

For the little story: I wrote a 30 chaptered Sabo x OC fanfic back when I was 15. Until this day it’s one of my most precious stories. It honestly isn’t that great looking back but I poured so much of myself into that and it helped me through so much it is definitely a fic I am very attached to.

It was written in French and it’s called La Chute des Notes. It’s still on fanfiction.net and Wattpad if anyone wants to check it out lmao. But anyway, it was a highschool!AU with a group of friends who become the found family of a new student called Mariella (the OC). 

And Bonney is one of those friends!!! I loved writing her so damn much, she was a whole lot of fun to write LKHLHUGFKF!!!

So yes, even if she isn’t super popular, she’s one of my babies ya kno? Just like Nojiko, who’s also part of the friend group.

Btw, all the members of the group were Sabo, Ace, Law, Bonney, Nojiko and the OC, Mariella. So yes, these characters are very close to my heart and a big part of it is because I wrote them at a time I felt terrible and they helped me through it <3

[jo-the-schmo]

Red, Dead, Reflections Ch. 1

A/N: Alright so... I started writing this fic over a year ago, and was posting it as I wrote it. I fell out of it for a few reasons but I’ve missed it. So I decided to start writing it again. The original versions of the first 5 chapters already exist on my blog but I want to repost them and do some editing. This way I can make the series more polished. I also want to try and do a once a week maybe schedule to give me some time in between writing chapters and so I can take some feedback into consideration.I hope some of the people who originally wanted to keep up with my series see this and I want to apologize for falling back on this. I feel really bad about it. I’ll try harder to commit to this. Thank you so much for being interested in my work. If anyone would like to be tagged just let me know, I don’t wanna assume the people who did before want to now. 

Summary: At the age of 23, you and your pseudo-family perform a heist gone wrong, leading you into a dangerous and seemingly impossible position. Discover your own history, the story of those around you, and gain new relationships along the way in this (sorta) choose your own adventure.

Warnings: Explicit language, blood, death, violence

Word count: 5,988

From Out West

“This is a little too ballsy for my liking, Austin.” You warned as you carefully adjusted the colored contact lenses in your eyes.

“Since when did you turn into a little pussy-willow?” He smirked at you while he turned a corner. 

“This is a bank, not a home robbery, so forgive me if I’m a tad nervous about this! We’re robbing a god damn bank in the 21st century, in a busy city that we aren’t necessarily familiar with!”

“Maybe you aren’t familiar, you know I’m a regular ol’LA boy.” You turned your head to look at the two in the backseat.

“Miguel, you can’t seriously be okay with this.” You questioned but were confident in it enough to make it a statement. He shrugged his shoulders, making that confidence literally evaporate. 

“We gotta trust Austin, as crazy as this plan is. We haven’t gotten caught yet.” You crossed you arms and made sure your wig was pinned right.

“Doesn’t mean we won’t be startin’ now.” You grumbled. 

“Come on, sissy! This plan is fool-proof! They’ll never even know it was us!” Eli chirped. 

“Oh yeah, except for the fact that this is a fucking bank and the FBI CAN get on our asses for this!” You swore it was exhausting being the only realistic one sometimes. “On top of that, there’s only 5 of us! We’re insane!” 

“6.” Austin corrected. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Your girlfriend won’t be in the damn room with us.” 

“She’s the ace up our sleeves, it would be silly for her to be in there with us.” The car smelled like old cigarettes, it made you sick. The band around your chest dug into your ribs. You opted to stay silent and relent for the time being, instead focusing on your disguise. The wig was carefully pinned to your real hair, it was short enough to be confused for a men’s haircut but had enough length to not require any glue. Dark brown hair, abnormally vibrant green eyes. And with the mask covering your face, that would be their only descriptions they could give to the police. Flat chest, boyish haircut, baggy black hoodie, just your average deviant. The destination was in view. 

“Alright,” Austin started. “everyone knows the plan, yeah? Gina is inside, she’ll send us the signal. We go in quick and make our presence known. I go behind the counter to make sure the tellers ain’t up to no funny shit. Miguel, you round up the lovely citizens into a corner, hit Gina a little to make it convincing. Eli, you take care of the money. And Y/N, I need you to stay in character, be loud and intimidating, keep the tellers in check when I’m helpin’ Eli, and the civils with Miguel, got it?” You all nodded. He looked back at Miguel. “You got the fake bomb ready?”

“Yes’ir.” 

“I’ll pass the big boss to you once I pick him out. Zoe is waiting for us in the alleyway between the bank and the office building. We get in, make some noise, scare them shitless, get the money, and go.” He parked up front of the white walls, you saw a mother walk through the glass doors with her toddler in a stroller. You immediately felt bad. 

“You promise this is the last job, right?” You looked at him seriously. “At least the last of something this big, I don’t think I could handle with again.”

“Of course! This is just to get us enough money to get us all out. The economy is garbage, think of it as taking what should already be ours.” You heard the crackle of the walkie on Austin’s lap. He threw it into his bag. “That’s the signal, masks on everyone.” Austin’s was a fox, long, fake salt and pepper hair rolled form under his hood. Eli’s was a raccoon, convincing copper bangs swooped between the ears. Miguel had an owl; disturbing blue eyes pierced your being. You strapped on your black dove and joined with group as they exited the stolen vehicle. You kept both your hands in the front pocket of your hoodie, trying to be discrete about the two handguns inside. Only one was loaded with real bullets, that was the backup, You preferred to use the blanks. Unable to trace, and when used properly, won’t hurt anyone. Austin and Eli took the leads. 

The doors were kicked in. 

“EVERYONE GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND RIGHT NOW! HANDS UP, ALL YOU! THIS IS A ROBBERY!” He screamed, pointing his gun at a man behind the counter about 3 yards away. Miguel was quick to shout at the people in line to get into the corner of the room. Gina pretended to try and defy, he slaps her, needless to say it’s convincing. 

“Dove, handle the worms.” You traded spots as Austin grabbed one of the men behind the counter. Your eyes locked with the poor woman, she was covering the stroller with her torso. You pointed your blank gun at some random person. 

“Stay on the ground or I’ll fucking shoot, ya hear me?” You lowered your voice, made it coarser, time to be a ‘man’. They nodded hysterically. The woman was crying. You could hear Eli screaming his demands in a fake accent. “Everyone hand over your phones. If any of you give me a reason to even SUSPECT you’re up to anything, I will shoot.” Everyone put their phones on the ground and slid them over toward you. You turned your attention to the back. “What’s the hold up, owl?” 

“I’m handling it.” He strapped the fake bomb to the teller’s chest, making him kneel down in the middle of the bank. “Listen up, everyone! This man has a bomb attached to his body. We have someone hacked into the security cameras. If you don’t follow our instructions to the T, they will blow a hole in this lot.” He paused to let the cries and gasps die out. “Now, for those said instructions, listen close. We will exit the building soon, you will stay down for 5 minutes.” He pointed at a clock on the wall. “Do not touch anything or move a muscle. When 5 minutes have passed, the big guy here-“ He patted the man’s shoulders and dropped a key wrapped in tissue in his lap. “will take a little drive off the premises. He will keep going until he reaches the designated location written on that tissue. If any of you contact the police before the end of the day, he will die, along with any other drivers in his vicinity. So, unless you want a substantial amount of blood on your hands, I’d suggest you keep quiet until midnight. As for the rest of you, you have permission to leave the building once that 5 minutes are up. But I would suggest keeping a low profile, for your safety and others’.” There was a loud crack. 

“I got it!” The phony Australian accent rang. Austin led the rest of the bank tellers to you, making them sit in the flood of civils. 

“Staying alert, Dove?”

“Don’t patronize me, stupid Fox.” This whole situation pissed you off. The baby was crying, mom was too, trying to hush the whines. 

“Fire a shot, Dove!” What? “Don’t let their insubordination stand.” He demanded. This was a fear tactic. He was trying to teach a lesson to the others. 

“I’m not firing a warning shot over a fucking baby, you psycho!” Your blood was boiling, this was overkill, he was way out of line with this. Of course, he wasn’t telling you to shoot the baby or the mother, but you weren’t going to cause more grief where it didn’t need to be. 

“Take the shot!”

“Fuck you!” 

“Why are you going against me?” Was he seriously doing this now? You felt like your head was going to explode. She was the only person with a child present. You put both of your pieces back in your hoodie and knelt next to her. She flinched as you approached, but that was to be expected. 

“Ma’am, I’m making an exception for you because you have a child with you, and that prick is really getting on my last nerve. You’re allowed to exit the building now, but the other rules still apply. People will die if you talk, maybe not you, but other people who have children like you do, most certainly. Take your kid and get out, don’t do anything out of the ordinary, and get out.” Her red eyes shook you to your core, familiarity. She nodded in both fear and appreciation. 

“Than-than-thank y-“ She was choking on her own misfortune, you decided to spare her. 

“Yeah, yeah, just get out.” She got up and collected herself, checking around the room as she walked out of the building. You could only see his eyes, but you could tell Austin was reaching his limit fast. An older gentleman stared at you. 

“At least one of you has a heart.” You were glad Austin was too focused on being pissed to hear that. You got up, kicking the phones toward the door as you walked. Austin grabbed you arm. 

“You’re lucky I didn’t kill her for that.” By letting that woman go, you showed weakness. It was a hint at your identities, but you didn’t care. 

“And you’re lucky I’m not shooting you for saying that. I’m not a killer like you, Fox.” Your voice was laced with venom. Eli had interrupted your dispute. 

“Alright lovebirds, time to play nice, we’ve got precious cargo.” He gave both of you a duffle bag, they were pretty hefty. Austin took a deep breath, putting on his best showman voice. 

“Alright folks! That right there is our cue to hit the road. Remember, 5 minutes on the clock. No one likes a-“ The doors were filled with red and blue, sirens. The police were here. “Shit!” Shit was right. “How the hell are they here?” Austin screamed. He gave you a shove. “It’s probably because of that god damn woman!” 

“There’s no way she would’ve had enough time for that.”

“And no one had a phone out, I was watching the whole time.” Miguel chimed. 

“We have bigger fish to fry right now! We gotta go.” You all dashed over to the back door, all you had to do was move towards the alley, if you could just get to the dump van, everything would be fine. Drive up to get the real car, leave that one with no prints or hair, and you’d be home free. The 4 of you booked it out the door. But the van was no where to be seen, instead, there were about 3 cops on either side which was 6 in total, trapping you in. 

“They must’ve got Zoe!” Yeah, no shit. 

“Put your hands up!” You all raised your arms, except of course for Austin. You kicked his calf. He didn’t budge. “I said put your god damn hands up!”

“In case you didn’t notice, pal, there’s a bomb in that building. If you don’t let us pass, I’ll blow that building out of existence, along with the man attached to it.” He pointed his gun to one of the cops to your left. “So, I suggest you let us through, or else you’re gonna piss me off more than I already am.” 

“We know the bomb is fake, drop to your knees or we will shoot!” Another one barked. Someone had ratted you out. You looked at Miguel and Eli, you weren���t letting this go down, not by a long shot. You tuned out Austin’s ramblings and whispered to the other two. 

“Be ready to run. I’m gonna buy you guys some time. Don’t kill any of them, disarm them.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Y/N?” Miguel questioned with panic. You took a deep breath. 

“Thank you for being my family.” You swept your leg behind Austin’s knees, and he collapsed to the ground as you stood. 

The world slowed to a crawl, pulling a gun out of your pocket, these were real bullets. You’ve never missed a target. You drew the attention of all 6 police officers, but no amount of training could prepare them. You fired 3 shots, each one hitting the hands of the officers Austin had been talking to. Their weapons fell from their hands. You felt bodies push past your legs, down the alley way away from the bank. You were glad the streets of LA were confusing. Now was the time. You whipped your body around to face the rest of the officers, firing rapidly at their shins. You weren’t gonna put blood on your hands. 

But deep down you knew, there was no making out of this one. You would buy them a few minutes while trying to subdue you. Just as your haphazard shots began, they fired precise ones of their own. Two passed through your skull, three in your chest, and one got a through almost half of your jugular. Both pieces fell away from you as gravity swaddled you. Bits of your wooden mask, blood, head pushing back unnaturally, seeing the backs of your made family run, they were almost home free. There was no pain after that point, you waited patiently for your back to hit the ground beneath you, but it never did. You kept falling. 

And falling. 

The midday light felt like it was slipping away, there were leather walls encompassing your lifeless form. No sound, no sense of texture, just the smell of dirt and decay. Then there was nothing but darkness, but that void that beckoned you, that pulled at your very being, was gone just as quick as it appeared. 

Your body shot forward with a violent intake for air. The gasps filled your lungs to the brim, your chest and head ached, throat tight. The coughing erupted from deep in your chest, which also held a different pain from the ever-tightening band around it. You threw you hoodie away and made quick work of loosening it just a bit, and in doing so noticed that your body was free of any physical wounds. There was still a soreness, and blood wiped off your skin, but there were no open wounds. You were incredibly cold, and at first you assumed that to be attributed to your near-death experience, until you looked up high to see to see an open window with snow falling outside. 

“I don’t think we’re in California anymore.” You muttered to yourself. You shivered, the place was covered in hay and in low light, that’s when the smell hit you. It reeked of animals, that would probably have something to do with the fact that you’re in a barn. Shakily, you got to your feet. Knees wobbling, your eyes adjusted, there were horses. That certainly explained the stench. A chill ran up your spine, the cold tickling at your vertebrae. You scanned the room for where you had tossed your hoodie, only to find it in a horse’s mouth. Your eyes widened in fear. “No, no, no, no, no, no!” You exclaimed. You rushed forward and grasped at the hanging sleeve, tugging on it with all your strength. “Drop it! Drop it right now!” 

The horse did not listen, in fact, now it seemed more hellbent on consuming the thick material. After hurtling a few curses at the horse, you heard a distinct rip. You fell back, the remnants of black cloth now in tatters. You let out a muffled scream of frustration. Even with the long sleeves of your cotton shirt, you were still freezing. It suddenly struck you how odd it is for it to be snowing at all. You figured you weren’t in California anymore, but you were somewhere that snows in the middle of May? How far were you? You couldn’t think of any states that snowed this late in the year. Were you in Maine? Up north, Canada? How did you even get here? 

“Did those idiots come back to get me? I could’ve sworn…” You could’ve sworn they ran like you told them to, and that you had experienced several fatal injuries. Is this hell? Purgatory? The other side? It was cold enough to be Hell that’s for sure. Nothing made sense. You found your mask on the ground, chunks of the painted wood were replaced with vacant space, splintered bullet holes. You fastened it to the first belt loop, it rested against your left pant leg. Pins dug into your scalp, wigs still surprisingly attached to your head. Your eyes watered, your contacts were drying out. You opted take them out now rather than waste your time trying to find drops in a barn. You flicked them away once they were out. “Now, if there’s a barn with animals, there’s gotta be a house with people.” You walked over to the large wooden doors as your talked to yourself, but today just had to be the worst day of your life. Something landed on top of you, or more accurately someone. 

You were surprised you didn’t feel any cracks as the weight crashed on you. Shifting your weight over, you elbowed the man in the jaw. He rolled off of you with a grunt of pain. You were quick to jab him in the stomach with the toe of your boot. Sputtering a cough with saliva dripping out the mouth, the man rushed to stand. He was trying to fight. 

“You’re on the wrong side of the mountains, partn’r.” He slurred. “This here is O’Driscoll territory, Which you don’t got no business bein’ in.” I’m in the mountains? Where the hell- He didn’t give you enough time to finish that thought before he was throwing a punch at you. If this basic boy thinks he can step in my personal space, he’s got another thing coming. You blocked the fist with your forearm and redirected the force toward the ground. With the base of your wrist, you hit his throat. The force of your own strength and the ever so impeccable sense of gravity caused him to wheeze, choke, and writhe on the ground. 

“Listen here, buddy,” you pressed your boot down on his chest “I have no idea where the hell I am right now. I don’t give a single shit about territory or whatever the fuck you’re going on about, but if you put your hands on me again, I’m gonna mangle your entire lower half with a rake.” You applied more weight. “I didn’t come here of my own volition, someone put me here. Which means, you’re little punk ass better tell me what’s going on or get out of my way so I can-“ Gunshots. Mystery man took your distraction as an opportunity to wriggle out form under you. They were ceaseless, did someone drop you off in the middle of a gang war, what the hell is going on? You were about to duck behind whatever cover was around you if the idiot of the room had decided he didn’t learn his lesson. 

“Are you with those crazies?” He yelled, peeking out the barn doors for only a second. “I should’ve known.” His voice was cold and malicious. “You’re with that son of a bitch, Dutch!”

“Who?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, pretty boy, they must’ve sent you up to spy on us! I’m gonna kill you for-“

“I literally have no idea what’s going on!” But he wasn’t listening to reason, clocked you in the ribs before you got the chance to block, then using your surprise to his advantage, hit you on the nose. There was a familiar crack and blood rush. “Did you just fucking break my nose, you ass?” You screeched toward the ground, wiping away the blood. 

You took him off guard by doing that, so you were quick to knock him in the jaw. The shooting stopped but you were a little preoccupied and decided not to waste anymore time. His arm bent to caress the side of his face. You rushed forward, lacing your arm between the gap his made. Using all your weight, you swung your legs out and forced him to drop to the ground. His back slammed forcefully and with a swift adjustment, your shins trapped his neck, locking him in place. You squeezed his neck enough to make him gasp. He tried to push away from you, but with the position you left him in, there’s no way he’d be able to without some sort of outside assistance. 

“Who are you calling pretty boy now? Huh? Who, bitch boy?” You heard the door start to open, you let lose and pulled the man up to shield you, locking his head so that you peek between a gap in your arm and his head. A man wearing a blue coat and hat walked in, his hands resting on his belt. 

“Well, well, what have we got ourselves here?” You couldn’t quite place his accent. You noticed he had a holster. 

“Don’t fuck with me, dude. I’ve got your friend trapped between me and you. No need to make this get crazy.” You warned, tightening your grip to enunciate your point. What sounded almost like a chuckle escaped his throat. 

“You must not be an O’Driscoll if you think he’s my friend.” You panicked, you tried to think of your next move, but he had plans of his own. “What’s your name, son?” Your suspicions were correct, it seems. This isn’t the first time someone’s confused you for a man, especially when you were trying so hard to not look like yourself. But maybe, you could use this to your advantage. 

“James West.” That was Austin’s code name for danger. If someone introduced you or called any of you James, it meant they weren’t trust worthy. You and Gina would usually use Jamie, but now James felt like the safer option. 

“Now how in the hell did you get involved in this, West?” He rested his hip against one of the stable posts.  

“I have no idea.” You threw the man away from you, there was no point holding him anymore. “I woke up here, and this guy just started attacking me.” You thought for a moment. “Are you Dutch?” You asked. This time, it was a single, hearty-

“HA!” He had a spark in his eye. “Me? Dutch? I ain’t that old yet, kid.” You rolled your eyes and pulled yourself up. 

“Well, my nose is broken because this little shit thought I was with you, so I have some choice words for this ‘Dutch’.” You huffed. “And don’t call me ‘kid’.” You brushed your fingers across the bridge of your nose, preparing yourself for what you were about to do. One deep breath in, out, pop. You pushed your nose back into place and winced. A wad of blood shot out. “Jesus shit!” You coughed, you never get used to having to do that. The blue coat cowboy looking mother-fucker looked semi-impressed. 

“Well, I’m not Dutch, but you could sure meet him if it pleases.” Something caught his attention. “Speak of the devil…” The door opened again. A man walked in with very distinct black hair. He was also a cowboy looking mother-fucker. Oh god, am I in yeeyee country? His eyes immediately locked on you. 

“Did you cause this mess, Arthur? Or have we just met a new friend?” The man who you presumed to be Dutch, had a deeper voice than the man apparently called Arthur, but their accents were similar. That was not promising for you. 

“That depends, his name is West, James West. I walked in a right fine mess between him and that there O’Driscoll.” Arthur pointed to the man still struggling to steady himself. Dutch choked a deep laugh, he seemed more amused than Arthur was. 

“Right fine is right, Arthur. You did this?” He asked. You nodded reluctantly. “You’re a good fighter, boy. Real good, it seems.” He strode over to the guy on the floor and picked him up by the collar, tossing him over to Arthur. “Morgan, you deal with this trash while I talk to our new pal.” Dutch walked over to you, confidence in his step, while Arthur threw the man back on the ground. He wrapped an arm around your shoulder and shook you around a bit. “James West, huh?”

“Yeah, what’s it to ya?” 

“Oh, this boy’s got spunk, Morgan!” You looked over and saw Arthur yanking the man around by the shirt. Dutch forced your attention back to him. “Now West, you’ve gotta understand our position here. We can tell clear as day you ain’t involved in a lick of this mess. But we don’t have a single clue as to what your business is up here. Now, you seem like a considerate young man, but I got worried folks on this mountain, and I can’t have no scamps running around and hellraising” He squeezed your shoulder. “So, don’t take any offense to what I’m about to ask, but what are you doing up here?” He looked you dead in the eyes. In your opinion, the question was fair. You couldn’t fully let your guard down, but they appeared to not be whoever put you here. Then again, these O’Driscoll’s didn’t seem to be either. 

“I can’t give you an answer to that one, Mr. …?” 

“Van Der Linde.” That’s one hell of a name. 

“Mr. Van Der Linde. Frankly, I have no damn clue why I’m here. One minute, I’m getting shot down in the middle of the day, and then I wake up trapped in some barn in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, in what looks like the ass end of winter. So, I’m a little confused right now to say the least.” You were clearly frustrated with your situation, he wasn’t oblivious to it. 

“Where are you from, son?”

“California.” That was a safe enough answer. 

“James West from out West. That’s certainly an opener.” He scratched his chin. “I’m gonna put you to a test young man.” He turned you around and lead you over to where Arthur had just gotten off the now bloody man. He was whimpering, begging under his breath for mercy. 

“I don’t think he’s got much to say, Dutch. They apparently happened upon this place and took it over. That’s all I’m getting’” 

“I’m going to give our new young friend a choice.” He pulled a revolver out of his holster and held the handle out to you. “In normal circumstances, I’d let Arthur handle this situation himself. But I’ve got an itching curiosity with you, kid.” You felt obligated to hold it in your hand. Looking down at the man, pity flared in your chest. “Should we kill him, or let him go? I’m letting you make the call.” What kind of question was this? Who were these guys? The choice wasn’t very difficult, you’d be a hypocrite if you did otherwise, and you weren’t compromising your promise on the off chance these guys might not like your opinion. 

You handed the gun back to Dutch. 

“Just because he’s an asshole, doesn’t mean he deserves to die. Let him go.” Dutch was intrigued by your answer. He looked over to Arthur with a smirk.

“I think I like kid!” 

“Please don’t call me ‘kid.” You requested. Arthur pulled the man to his feet and threw him outside.

“Get outta here before he regrets it.” The man darted into the snow, leaving a trail behind him. 

“Grab the horse, Arthur. We gotta get something out of this.”  You were lead outside to find a horrific scene, bodies were strewn about the snowy landscape. Whoever these guys were, they were not to be trifled with. You should play this safe. 

There was a house not too far away, the snow was dense. It was more than freezing. You sent a glare to the horse Arthur led past you. You’ll pay for this, you dumb fucking horse. With your adrenaline dying down, your whole being felt frozen. 

“Normally, I wouldn’t be one for disrupting dead for anything other than money, but you’ll die out here without something warm, Mr. West.” Dutch gestured to one of the several bodies riddled through the snow. You swallowed the lump in your throat, trying your best not to think about how you were robbing from dead people. It wouldn’t be the first time, but you still didn’t feel good about it. You separated from him and carefully stepped around the bodies littered in the snow. You found a man with his face in the snow, you pretty much picked him so you wouldn’t have to see his face as you stripped him of his coat. It didn’t look particularly warm initially, but anything would be better than this. The arms bent limply back as you peeled the sleeves away. Luckily upon further inspection, you were happy to learn there was a sort of wool lining inside, that would at least help insulate your own body heat. A sudden commotion broke out from inside the rustic home. A man yelling for Dutch and a woman screaming. Your instincts made you spring into action, you lept through large portions of the snow to make it to the steps faster and before you knew it you were bursting through the door. A blonde man wearing another cowboy-looking hat was chasing a woman around a table. 

“What the hell are you doing, Micah?” Arthur questioned as him and Dutch followed you in. 

“We got a feisty one over here, boys!” He hollered. Oh, you were not comfortable with this type of language.

“Stop chasing the poor woman, ya moron!” He warned with more intensity. You weren’t gonna see this go down, that’s for sure. You ran up behind the man called Micah, grabbed his collar, and used his weight to pull his back towards you, and then to the ground. His body slammed, he let out a surprised yelp, followed by a pained groan.

“Fucking sicko! Stop chasing her around, she’s scared!” 

“Get out of my house!” The woman bellowed. Admittedly, you had no idea what was going on, but you knew you could at least try and defuse the situation. You put your hands up to appear less threatening. 

“Miss, I don’t know who you are or what in God’s name is going on, but I promise I am not here to hurt you.” You spoke to her in a calm voice. Whatever was going on, it clearly had her frazzled. “I don’t have any weapons, and I don’t make it habit of hurting people who don’t need hurting. You clearly have been hurting for no reason. Can you explain to me what’s happened so that I can help you with this situation?” You took a cautious step around the table to make sure she wouldn’t dart away from you, you kept steady eye contact. 

“They…they killed my husband a few days ago! They took over my home and locked me in the basement!” She wept. Maybe these O’Driscolls were the ones to stow you in the barn, they sure seemed like the type with this new information. 

“I’m so sorry for your loss, ma’am. I can assure you that those men won’t be bothering you anytime soon. Can you-“ You heard glass shatter, looking over, you found Micah scattering to his feet, fire was spreading from the floor to the wall at an incredible rate. It was already crawling up the right-side wall before you had a chance to react. There was no way you could put that out by yourself, and the others weren’t exactly jumping at the chance to help you. You settled on running to grab some blankets from the bed across the room. The boys were leading the woman out of the house and she reluctantly followed. Micah sent you a glare as you passed him out of the house. “Oh, don’t you look at me like that, you weren’t any help!” You knew you should keep your mouth shut, but you knew you were right on this one. The group was walking toward some horses, you followed behind. 

“Micah, lead the horse back to camp.” You handed the blankets to the woman. 

“Thank you.” She seemed genuine but was also hurt by your sentiments.

“It’s no problem, ma’am.”

“Adler, Sadie Adler is my name.” She wrapped herself in the blankets.

“Well, it’s no problem, Mrs. Adler. It’s the bare minimum to what I could’ve done.” You hoped whatever camp Dutch mentioned was close by. This cold was blistering. 

“Mrs. Adler, you may ride with me, we’ll get you back to people who can help.” Dutch hopped up onto a white horse, lending a hand for Sadie to pull herself up. “Arthur, please take our new friend with you. I don’t think he’s in any shape to be riding.” Arthur nodded, heaving himself with ease onto a spotted mare? You couldn’t tell if it was a girl, but you just got that vibe. He did not give you a hand. Oh yeah, I’m a dude. A manly man. You gripped the back of the saddle and used all the arm strength you had to get onto the bare back on the horse. You hoped this ride wasn’t going to be too bumpy because you were not about to get punched because you had to grab onto this man and couldn’t tell if someone was a homophobe or not. You sure hoped these people weren’t, but you weren’t exactly in the position to be picky. 

“Pearson’s not gonna happy about this.” Arthur mentioned as the horses pushed forward.

“Mr. Pearson isn’t happy about anything except his drink. He’ll be alright.” Now seemed like a good a time as any to start asking questions. They couldn’t go anywhere away from you at the moment. 

“Not to interrupt or anything, but could someone tell me where I am, or what day it is. Could someone please tell me what the deal is?”

“We’re north of New Hanover if the maps are correct. We’re planning to head down there as soon as this winter passes. God knows how long that’s gonna take.” Dutch complained. You had never heard of New Hanover, but apparently it was winter. Maybe you really did get shot, put into a hospital maybe? Then these guys… You panicked for a second. O’Driscoll wasn’t another name for them was it? It didn’t make much sense but no one else would put this much effort into stealing you away. “As for the day, I couldn’t tell ya exactly. It’s winter in the year of our Lord 1899.” He laughed. What?

“What?”

“Ah, just bit of a joke, son. We live in dark times. We’re hurtling straight into a new century.” Wait was he joking or not joking?

“It’s 1899?” You tried to keep your voice neutral, but he seemed to pick up on your worry.

“Yes, it is, son.” He paused. “Are you alright?” You were anything but alright. These people are crazy, I’m trapped on a mountain with some insane cultists who think they’re in the 19th century, I’m fucked. “Arthur, we need to hurry, the boy’s looking pale.” 

Your head felt fuzzy, colors were blurring together. I am not stuck on a god damn mountain in 1899, I’m not, that’s physically impossible. This is all a dream, or some weird set up. You felt like you were 19 again, disconnected, afraid, losing it. You weren’t gonna go back there again, you wouldn’t! You didn’t know you had stopped breathing. You didn’t feel Arthur’s arm catching you so you wouldn’t get trampled. Everything was black. 

[cheemerthelizard]

I’m... I’m...

Body swap scenario! I absolutely love these, and thought it would be fun to try out my own. I made a short fic for each of the Crusaders, but I would love to do these for other characters, and probably will. I would also like to point out that these interactions will be completely platonic. Okay, enough explanation! Enjoy!

The Stand’s attack sent you flying back, and it wasn’t until you hit a pole that you stopped.

“Ugh...” you grunted. You looked up from the pole that you had hit, and saw your body on the ground, still unmoving. No. You didn’t just die, did you? You looked down at your hands. Nope. Still normal. But they looked familiar. Not yours, but familiar. You gasped, frantically checking the clothes, face, and top of the head of the body you were in. This wasn’t you. “I’m... I’m...” You clamped your mouth shut. That was the voice of...

“Jotaro!”

You couldn't help but notice how bulky it felt in Jotaro's body. In a good way, of course. His arms and legs were toned to perfection, and you could feel the squeeze of his abs on your stomach. Or rather, his stomach.

Your body, which you could only assume had Jotaro’s soul trapped inside it, started to gradually get up. You quickly ran towards him, and tried helping him up. Or, was it her?

“Thanks, but I can get up myself.” It was extremely disassociating hearing your voice when you weren’t speaking. It seemed like Jotaro noticed something off, too, as his eyes (your eyes?) widened and he looked up, way up, to lock eyes with you.

“You’re not dead,” you reassured him. “You’re in my body.”

“I’m in your what?” Jotaro was showing small signs of panic, something you’d never seen before, as he started turning round and round, slapping his hands on his cheeks, and grabbing his arms and legs. After a while, he looked back at you. “Good grief, (Y/N), it wouldn’t hurt for you to hit the gym every once in a while. Your limbs are like twigs.”

You could feel heat rising to your cheeks, but you didn’t know if it was from embarrassment or anger. You didn’t even know how to respond to that. “Shut up! My physique is fine as it is!” Ooh. Those words sounded much more intimidating in Jotaro’s voice.

“Okay, but if you snap your arm handshaking someone, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“It only feels like that to you because you’re stronger than me,” you huffed. “In fact, I can probably pick you up with ease in this new body.”

“Don’t. You. Dare.” Jotaro glared you down, but in your body, it was far less intimidating. In fact, you had to hold back laughter from how silly it looked.

“What are you gonna do? I know my body’s limits, and I know it can do nothing to yours.”

“Because I have Star Platinum by my side,” Jotaro said. However, in attempt to show his Stand off, he summoned Ace of Pentacles instead. That could only mean one thing...

“Oh, ho, ho!” You looked Star Platinum in the eyes, then looked down at Jotaro smugly. “Looks like I have the almighty Stand now!”

Both Ace and Star looked a little confused and defensive at their user's body, as if they knew it was someone else.

"Don't worry, Star," you smiled. "It's me, (Y/N). And Ace, that's just Jotaro."

Both Stands seemed to accept that answer, and lowered their defenses. You crossed your arms, and smirked. "I can even calm Star Platinum better than you," you said to Jotaro. "What does that say about you as a Stand user?"

“Can you wipe that stupid grin off your face?” Jotaro asked. “It looks good on you, but not on me. Also, we need to find who did this, and fast.”

“Yeah, I agree,” you replied. “Although it’s nice being tough and strong, it’s weird feeling something between my thighs.”

This time, it was Jotaro’s turn to clench his teeth and blush. “I’m going to kill you once I have Star Platinum again,” he murmured.

“Oh, don’t act like you can’t feel a difference in your chest.”

“Anyway,” Jotaro quickly changed the subject, “we have to find the others and explain this situation. Let’s go.”

“Fine,” you laughed. Woah. You’ve never heard Jotaro’s voice laugh like you just did. It sounded nice, actually. “I can’t wait to see what Star Platinum feels like in action.”

“It’s super cool.”

“Guess I’ll find out when we get to our enemy.” You grabbed Jotaro and hoisted him up, which made him give out a small yelp, and immediately clamp his mouth.

“Yeah,” he said. “I’m not dealing with this body forever.”

Once you got to the hotel that everyone was staying in, it took a couple of protests to convince Joseph that you were really in each other’s bodies.

“You’re kidding,” Joseph laughed. “You’ve got to be kidding!”

“Mr. Joestar, I promise you, this is serious!” you told him.

“You’re doing pretty good, Jotaro,” Joseph replied. “I can’t believe you’d call me anything other than old man.”

“That’s because I didn’t, old man!” Jotaro growled. “We’re telling the truth! We had an encounter with an enemy!”

“Mr. Joestar,” Kakyoin said, “I think they’re serious. Look at the way they stand. The look in their eyes. The subtle stuff that they wouldn’t be able to catch if they were pranking us.”

Joseph looked up and down both of them, then muttered, “You're right. They do kinda look like their bodies have swapped.”

"Well," Avdol added, "there's only one way to reverse this, you know."

"Killing the user," you sighed.

"But it's getting late," Joseph told you. "We'll deal with it tomorrow."

"No!" Jotaro protested. "I'm not going to sleep in a girl's body!"

"I'd take your place, Jotaro," Polnareff snickered. He didn't realize that you had summoned Star Platinum and sent a punch straight to his face.

"Don't you EVER say something like that again!" you yelled. "I'm lucky I swapped bodies with Jotaro and not you!"

"Anyway," Kakyoin glared at Polnareff, who was rubbing his cheek, "how does it feel in a boy's body, (Y/N)? Just out of curiosity."

"Strange," you answered. "Really strange."

"What feels different?" Polnareff asked, a smug smile spread across his face.

"I don't really know how to answer that," you laughed. "I mean, how do you describe being in a body that's not yours? Surreal?"

"Old man, please, we have to find this guy tonight! I'm not sleeping in (Y/N)'s body." Jotaro begged Joseph. "Do you realize how awkward this is for both of us?"

“My mind has been made,” Joseph said. “We’re going to wake up tomorrow feeling refreshed and ready to catch our Stand user!”

“Hey, I’m sure it won’t be that bad,” you consoled Jotaro, although you were unsure who you were trying to convince. “As long as you keep yourself fully clothed, it’ll be fine... I think.”

“Same goes for you,” Jotaro added. “I mean, I guess I don’t mind the shirt coming off, but the pants stay on.”

“That’s fair,” you said. “Well, goodnight, Jotaro.”

“Night.”

The two of you went to your hotel rooms, and when you closed the door, you sighed heavily. Being in another person’s body was exhausting. You turned to your bed, and saw Iggy, head tilted.

“Relax, Iggy, it’s me, (Y/N),” you chuckled. “Jotaro and I had an encounter with a Stand that swapped our bodies.”

You went to the bathroom to brush your teeth, which was really weird, since you were staring into the mirror at someone else’s reflection. When you were done, you jumped into your bed, which Iggy kept warm for you. Yawning, you curled up into your favorite sleeping position, and closed your eyes. The problem was, in Jotaro's body, you were far from comfortable in that position. You tried another one. Still uncomfortable. You kept trying all sorts of different positions that you hoped would work in this body, but no prevail. Eventually, you had tossed and turned so much Iggy decided it would be better to sleep on the floor. Groaning, you got up from bed, left your room, and knocked on Jotaro's door.

"What do you want?" you heard your voice from the other side.

"What sleeping position is the most comfortable for you?" you asked.

"I could ask you the same thing." Jotaro went to open the door, but didn't realize you were leaning on it. As soon as he opened it, you stumbled over and fell down right next to him.

"Hey, try to be a little more careful in my body," Jotaro said. "I don't want to come back to bruises and scars that were from something stupid like leaning on an opening door and falling over. Anyway, I usually sleep straight up, legs spread apart, arms to my sides."

After exchanging sleeping positions, you headed back to your room, where Iggy had fallen asleep on the floor. You tried the position that Jotaro told you, and noticed how comfortable it was in his body. Finally, you were able to go to sleep. Hopefully, this whole thing would be sorted out in the morning.

“Kakyoin!”

You had to be honest, even if he wasn’t as buff as the other men in the group, you could definitely feel a difference from your body and his. After all, he did carry some beef with him, and it was noticeable to you.

“Ugh, I think I hit my head too hard,” you heard your voice say. “My voice sounds all weird, and I feel really strange.”

Right. If you were in Kakyoin’s body, then Kakyoin was bound to be in your body. You kind of wanted to tell him the situation, but another part of you wanted to see him figure it out himself.

“Wait a minute,” he muttered. “This voice sounds familiar. And these hands look familiar.” He looked down at his (your) shirt, and gasped. “This is... (Y/N)’s body!” He looked up at you (him) in horror. “Tha-that’s... my... body...”

You nodded.

“And I’m... not in it...”

Again, you nodded.

“Why don’t you say something, (Y/N)?” Kakyoin shuddered. “You’re creeping me out.”

“There hasn’t been a need,” you answered.

“Fair,” he nodded. “Still! Aren’t you freaked out by this, too?” He got up and started moving his limbs back and forth. “It’s so...” he shivered in disgust. “I feel like a pervert in this body.”

“Don’t say it like that!” you exclaimed. “You’re making me imagine things that you’d do in my body I don’t want to imagine.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Kakyoin quickly apologized. “I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It’s okay,” you told him. “We should probably tell the others before we go off and try to find the Stand user ourselves.”

Kakyoin nodded in agreement, but before you headed off to the hotel, you heard him say, “Wait. Do we have each other’s Stands? Or do we keep the same Stand?”

“Well, only one way to find out,” you shrugged. Both of you summoned your Stands. Or, rather, each other’s Stands, because, sure enough, the Stands didn’t travel with you. You were able to harness Hierophant Green, and Kakyoin could wield Ace of Pentacles. And the Stands seemed to realize that whoever was in this body was not their user, but they were hesitant to do anything that would kill the intruder.

"Don't worry, Hierophant, I'm (Y/N)," you told him. "Kakyoin and I got into a little bit of trouble, and now our bodies are swapped." Luckily, Hierophant seemed to understand, and calmed down.

"Okay, now that we know the Stand situation," Kakyoin said, "let's go tell everyone else what happened." He started walking to the hotel, and you quickly followed.

"So," Jotaro leaned against the wall and crossed his arms, "my two best friends have been attacked by an enemy Stand while going to buy some things, and now they're trapped in each other's bodies."

"Sounds about right," you nodded.

"Yeah, that's what happened," Kakyoin replied.

Jotaro lowered his hat and sighed. "Good grief," he muttered. "This isn't going to end well."

"Anyway," Kakyoin said, "we should probably find this user as soon as possible. It won't be good if we're forever in each other's bodies."

"I wholeheartedly agree," Joseph answered, "but it's getting really late. How about we get a good night's sleep and wake up completely ready to take on the user?"

"No!" you both exclaimed at the same time.

"This feels weird! I don't wanna sleep in Kakyoin's body!" You squirmed just thinking about it. "No offense, Kakyoin."

"None taken, because I feel the exact same way," Kakyoin replied.

"Well, the rest of us are tired," Polnareff said, "so unless you plan on going out in the streets of Cairo alone, you better get some rest."

"Fine," both of you sighed. Before you headed off to your rooms, though, Kakyoin shared something with you.

"In case you didn't know, my most comfortable sleeping position is on my side, curled up. It would probably be the most comfortable to sleep in that position."

You told Kakyoin your usual sleeping position, too, then both of you headed off to your hotel rooms.

"Oh, and one more thing."

You turned your head. "Yeah?"

"I have PJs if you want to use those."

You thought about it for a little bit, then said, "You sure trust me a lot if you'd let me undress in your body. Unless it's not about trust..." you wiggled your eyebrows.

Well, now you knew what you looked like when you blushed. "Um, uh, no, that's not what I meant, at all, I promise," Kakyoin stuttered. "I mean, my school uniform isn't the comfiest thing to sleep in, so, heh, y'know, PJs are, are much comfier. It really is about trust, honest!"

"I know what you meant," you laughed as you went down to pat his head. Er, your head. This was so confusing. "And trust me, I'll change as quickly as possible."

Kakyoin sighed with relief. "Okay, I'll go get them from my room."

While you patiently waited for Kakyoin to come back, you started playing with his hair, pulling his long strand down, then letting go and watching it bounce back up again. It was actually pretty entertaining. At least, more entertaining than it should be.

"Okay, here's the PJs," Kakyoin tossed them up to you. "Good night, (Y/N)."

"Good night," you replied.

This time, you truly parted ways. When you got to your room, Iggy stood on all fours defensively.

"Don't worry, Iggy," you chuckled. "Kakyoin and I got into a fight with an enemy Stand, but I'm still (Y/N)."

Iggy laid back down, and yawned as he fell asleep. Quickly, you changed out of Kakyoin's uniform and slipped into his much comfier pajamas, and turned off the light, snuggling up next to Iggy. This would all be sorted out in the morning, you knew it. For now, you needed to rest. And rest you did.

“Joseph!”

You were always surprised on how fit Joseph was, especially with his old age, but this was beyond what you thought it would feel like. You expected at least a few creaky bones, but he was still in tip top shape, and you couldn’t help but flex his arms and feel his strength coursing through your veins.

“OH MY GO-“ your voice shouted, but cut off for some odd reason. You whipped your head around to see your body suddenly reanimated, spinning around in circles and darting its eyes all across the surface. “What happened? Why am I in (Y/N)’s body?”

“Mr. Joestar, please calm down!” you begged. “I don’t want people thinking I’m crazy!”

“Ah!” Joseph exclaimed. “You’re in my body, too? What’s going on?”

“Do you really think I have any more of a clue than you do?” you asked, still not used to his voice. “Look, I’m a high school girl in a grown man’s body! Do you think this is any easier for me?”

“We have to get back and tell the others about all of this!” Joseph said. “Come on, (Y/N), let’s go!”

As Joseph started running, you joined him, boosted by his incredible strength, and scooped him up along the way.

“Mr. Joestar,” Avdol said, “don’t you think a prank like this is a little too much for our current situation? And how did you get (Y/N) to agree to this?”

“Avdol, I am (Y/N),” you replied. “This isn’t a joke! I have Ace of Pentacles and everything!” You tried to summon her, but you were met with purple thorns. Uh oh. That could only mean that Joseph had Ace.

“This isn’t helping our argument,” Joseph muttered as he summoned Ace of Pentacles. “Look, we’re telling the truth, you have to believe us,” he pleaded.

“Favorite colors,” Jotaro said. “Go.”

“(Color),” you stated.

“Yellow,” Joseph answered.

“Favorite foods.”

“(Food).”

“Squid ink spaghetti.”

“My favorite food.”

You stayed silent, since you had no idea.

“Your mom’s cooking,” Joseph stated. “You used to be such a momma’s boy.”

“Yup, they’re in the wrong bodies,” Jotaro concluded. “There’s no way (Y/N) would have known that.”

“Finally!” you sighed. “I was beginning to worry you’d never believe us and we’d have to go find this guy on our own.”

“That would be pretty bad,” Kakyoin chuckled. “Neither of you have fighting Stands.”

“At least I have a fighting body,” Joseph beamed, putting his hands on his hips. “Well, I did.”

“That fighting body is mine now,” you smirked, flexing his muscles.

“Cut that out!” Joseph tried shoving you, but in your body, it did next to nothing. He tried harder. Still almost nothing. He pushed his back against you. He ran and jumped. He attacked you from above. Everything he tried was useless as you stood, as strong as a pillar, in the exact same place.

“You’re no fun,” he pouted. “You could at least act like I did something.”

You looked down at him, gave him a tiny push, and watched as he toppled over. “Nice acting, Mr. Joestar,” you chuckled.

“That hurt,” Joseph mumbled. “That hurt a lot.”

“What’s that?” You held up a hand to an ear. “I can’t hear you since you’re so much closer to the ground than I am.”

“I’ll pay you back when this is over, you know,” Joseph warned, “so I’d stop now if I were you.”

“Then why don’t you stop?” you asked him. “After all, you are me.”

“You know what I mean,” he grumbled.

“I know, I know,” you laughed. “I’ll stop.”

“Anyway, I’m getting a little tired,” Joseph yawned. “How about we hit the hay for tonight? We can go after this Stand user tomorrow when we’re refreshed.”

“Oh, you’re delusional if you think I’m spending a night in your body!” you exclaimed.

“And you’re delusional if you think I’m going after a Stand user in the middle of the night!” Joseph retorted. “No way, no how! An old man needs his sleep, you know.”

“But you’re not an old man right now, are you?” you countered. “You’re a high school girl. We stay up late. You should be raring to go, excited to explore the wonders of Egypt late at night.”

“If that were true,” Joseph said, “Then you should be exhausted and begging me to go to bed, yet here you are.”

“Good point,” you muttered. “Fine. We’ll go to bed.”

When you got to your room, Iggy was already asleep, so he couldn’t be bothered by your arrival. Thank goodness. He probably wouldn’t take too kindly to your new, hopefully temporary form. Unfortunately, you had to toss and turn so much that you ended up awakening him, anyway. And, of course, Iggy wouldn’t allow anyone but you to sleep in your bed.

“Iggy! It’s me!” you cried as you held the growling dog as far away from Joseph’s hair as possible. “It’s (Y/N)! Mr. Joestar and I got into some trouble with an enemy, and our bodies are swapped!” Iggy seemed to believe you, thankfully, and stopped attacking you.

A knock on the door made you jump, but you quickly asked, “Who is it?”

“It’s Joseph,” came your voice from the other side. “How do you sleep in this body? I can’t find a comfortable position.”

You sighed, realizing you were suffering the same problem. “I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours,” you answered, opening the door.

“I usually sleep with my arms and legs extended off the bed, face up,” Joseph answered.

“How do you sleep like that?” you asked.

“How do you not?”

“That’s fair.”

You told Joseph your preferred sleeping position, and then he left back to go to his room. Sinking down in your bed, you realized how comfortable it was to sleep belly down in this body. You yawned, and slowly drifted off to sleep. You would swap back to your body in the morning, and that’s all you needed to know to feel at peace.

“Polnareff!”

Having your hair in a tower felt really strange, considering you’ve never had it up like that before. It felt weirder than having all of the bulk from his muscles on your skin. Although, you were less worried about how you felt, and more worried about how Polnareff would feel. He’s the one you trusted the least in your body.

The sound of not so distant screams caught your attention, and you knew Polnareff was awake.

“This is bad, this is really bad!” he panicked. “I shouldn’t be in a girl’s body!”

Well, that was a relief. He didn’t seem to be immediately overjoyed. Maybe he would be trustworthy after all.

“Look, let’s just get back to the hotel,” you suggested, “and we can figure this out with the help of everyone else.”

“That sounds good,” Polnareff answered, still a little shaken. It wasn’t until you two had been walking for a while when you heard Polnareff giggle a little.

“You know, I was a bit freaked out at first, but feeling this light and delicate is a nice change.”

“I’m not light and delicate!” you shot back. “I’m just as strong as everyone else!”

“Relax, madame,” Polnareff held up his hands in defense. “All I’m saying is that you feel light and delicate. You’re far from that.”

“Thanks,” you answered. You could feel a light blush coming up to your cheeks. “That means you won’t be touchy-feely when you’re alone if we don’t get this sorted out by nightfall, right?”

“No promises,” Polnareff smirked.

“No, there has to be a promise,” you insisted. “I won’t let you get a moment alone if there’s no promise.”

“I’m kidding,” Polnareff laughed nervously. “I’ll keep my hands, er, your hands, away from your body.”

“Good,” you finished, making sure not to break your seriousness. “Thank you.”

After a few minutes of walking, Polnareff started to get a little jumpy. “Um, I don’t know if this is okay, but I really have to use the restroom. May I? I know it might not be comfortable with you, but I’m about to-“

“Just go,” you interrupted. “We all need to.”

“Thank you,” Polnareff sighed, and ran into the men’s restroom, quickly coming out and running to the woman’s.

“What do you mean there’s no urinals?! You pee SITTING DOWN?!”

You turned beet red as you heard your voice yell out, and covered your face in your hands. That was your voice, in your body, shouting those very words.

“I’m going to kill you,” you hissed when Polnareff left the restroom.

“You can’t kill me, you only have Ace of Pentacles,” Polnareff gloated. However, once he summoned Ace, he was taken aback. “Uh oh.”

“You’re lucky I don’t want to kill my body, or I’d have Silver Chariot slice you to bits right now,” you growled, summoning Polnareff’s Stand. “Girls pee sitting down. That’s why there’s no urinals. Don’t ever, EVER, say those words in that order again, especially to other women who don’t know the situation we’re in right now. Got it?” You had the tone of a mother who quietly scolded her child in public, the angry whisper when she can’t cause a scene.

“Yup, I got it,” Polnareff nodded quickly and quietly.

Once you got to the hotel, you and Polnareff explained, as best as you could, what happened to the two of you.

“So, you’re (Y/N), and you’re Polnareff?” Kakyoin pointed to the opposite bodies as he said your names, which were, at the time, the correct bodies. This was confusing. You both nodded, and Kakyoin sighed. “This is bound to make at least one of you mad.”

“Already happened,” Polnareff replied sheepishly.

“Anyway,” you interrupted, “we need to find the user, or else we’ll be stuck in these bodies forever.”

“Not tonight,” was Joseph’s answer. “We aren’t going tonight. I doubt he’ll get too far before the sun rises.”

“What?” you exclaimed. “No! I don’t trust Polnareff for a whole night!”

“Sleep in the same room I don’t care,” Joseph answered, “but I’m getting my rest, no matter what.”

“Look, I promise,” Polnareff told you. “I absolutely, positively promise nothing will happen to this body while I’m in it.”

“Doesn’t matter, you’re sleeping in my room tonight,” you replied. However, after some consideration, you remembered that Iggy was in your room, and that he loathed Polnareff more than anyone else. He would most likely rip all of your hair out before you could tell him that you were (Y/N). “Actually, your room. Your room tonight.”

“You’re sleeping on the floor, then, got it?” Polnareff asked. “My room, my rules.”

“It’s better than getting attacked by Iggy,” you sighed.

“You’re going to make a woman sleep on the floor?” Joseph asked. “What kind of man does that?”

“But I’m the woman now,” Polnareff countered. “Therefore, I get the bed.”

“Well, I’d rather wake up with back problems instead of going the rest of the day with back problems, so the bed’s all yours.”

“Huh,” Kakyoin said. “That was fast. I would at least expect (Y/N) to insist that Polnareff get her mattress from her room, since he’s in the body that Iggy hates the least.”

“That’s a good idea,” you complimented. “Polnareff, if you could be so kind and-“

“Already ahead of you,” he answered, leaving his room.

“I wonder how long it’ll take Iggy to realize that the person in your body is, in fact, not you,” Kakyoin chuckled.

“My bet is thirty seconds.”

“I’ll bet less than thirty.”

“Iggy! Iggy, stop! No!”

You heard a loud thud and barks from the tiny dog.

“Looks like I was right,” Kakyoin smirked.

“I’ll go calm Iggy down,” you laughed, and walked to your room. Hopefully Iggy connected the dots before you were attacked, as well. You entered the room, and he reared up and charged towards you.

“Iggy, wait!” you exclaimed, but it was too late. Iggy had pulled out a good amount of your hair, and you could smell an awful stench.

“Iggy,” you sighed, “it’s (Y/N). Polnareff and I swapped bodies.”

“I probably shouldn’t have called that dog a dumb mutt,” Polnareff muttered. “I think that’s what gave it away to him.”

“You think?” you groaned. “Come on, let’s get this mattress to your room.”

After some hard work (mostly put in by you), the mattress was successfully in Polnareff’s room, and you immediately curled up, and Polnareff landed face down on his bed. After a while, both of you were tossing and turning. Something about the way you two were sleeping did not settle well with the bodies you were in.

“Are you really going to sleep that way in that body?” Polnareff snorted. “(Y/N), that body is made to sleep face down. No other position is comfortable.”

“Maybe that’s why you can’t sleep in my body, either,” you suggested. “You’re sleeping in it wrong.”

“Perhaps that is what’s wrong,” Polnareff said to himself. He changed positions to how you were sleeping, and sighed happily. “My, my, this is so much more comfy!”

“Same here,” you replied. “Well, I’m going to go to sleep now. Goodnight, Polnareff.”

“Night.”

“Avdol!”

Woah. How many layers of clothing did this guy have? All of his coats and everything weighed you down much more than your clothing. However, all of that weight paid off for Avdol, because his arms were stronger than you could even imagine yours being.

“So, you’re awake, as well.”

You turned your head, and saw your body, fully reanimated. You concluded that the one speaking must have been Avdol.

“It seems that Stand has the ability to swap bodies,” he muttered, “and we happened to be the two he came into contact with.”

“Great,” you mumbled. “How do we reverse it?”

“Killing the user seems to be the only solution,” Avdol sighed. “Of course, he ran away as soon as his Stand landed an attack on us, so it’ll take a while for us to find him. But when we do, I’m prepared to use Magician’s Red, no matter what.” He summoned his Stand, but soon realized that it wasn’t who he thought it would be. Instead of summoning the fiery bird, he summoned Ace of Pentacles.

“Nice,” you said as you summoned Avdol’s former sidekick. “So I get to use him when the time comes.”

“I guess so,” Avdol chuckled. “Just remember, use those flames responsibly. We don’t want a bystander to get hurt.”

“I understand,” you nodded. “Plus, we should probably update the others on our situation before we go and fight this guy alone. For all we know, we could be swapped into a bystander’s body before we have the chance to fight him.”

“Good thinking,” Avdol replied. “Then it’s settled. We’ll go tell the others about this, first.”

When you got back to the hotel, Jotaro was already standing outside the doorway, leaning on the brick wall.

“There’s something different about you two,” he eyed you and Avdol suspiciously. “What did the enemy Stand do to you this time?”

“Swapped our bodies,” Avdol answered.

“So it was Avdol who answered me, then?” Jotaro asked. You both nodded.

“Ah, Avdol and (Y/N) are back,” Polnareff said as he emerged from the hotel’s entrance. “What supplies did you get?”

“Actually, we didn’t have time to get supplies,” you admitted. “We were attacked by an enemy.”

“Well, you got out fine,” Polnareff replied accusingly, “so why didn’t you get supplies after the attack?”

“Because we didn’t get out fine,” Avdol answered. “We’re in the wrong bodies.”

Polnareff playful grin suddenly vanished. “Oh,” he muttered.

“Anyway, we came here because it would be easier to take on this enemy with all five of us attacking,” you explained. “Where’s Mr. Joestar?”

“He already fell asleep,” Polnareff answered. “It is getting late, after all.”

“Then we’ll go without him.”

“No, that doesn’t seem like a good idea,” Avdol told you. “I mean, think about it. Leaving a member of our team alone while he’s out like a light? That could easily put him in danger. Plus, it would be bad if we all felt tired while trying to fight against someone else. We should sleep.”

“Fine,” you groaned. “Let’s go to bed.”

When you got to your bedroom, Iggy didn’t do much but give you a slight head tilt.

“It’s me, Iggy,” you consoled the worried dog. “It’s (Y/N). Avdol and I got put in the wrong bodies from an enemy.”

Iggy laid back down, accepting the answer. As you brushed your teeth, you kept staring at the reflection that wasn’t yours. It was strange to be in another body. As you laid in your bed, you noticed how comfortable it was. Even in different sleeping positions, you felt like you could sleep for hours. Avdol’s body was a blessing right now, since you probably couldn’t have possibly fallen asleep in any other body from the gravity of this situation. However, right as you were about to be out for the night, you heard a knock on your door. “Who is it?”

“Avdol,” your voice said from the other side. “Pardon my interruption, but I could really use some sleep, and for that, I need your sleeping position.”

You opened the door, and looked down to meet eyes with Avdol. After you told him your usual sleeping position, he nodded, and went back to his hotel room. Now, you went back to your bed, and almost instantly fell asleep. Tomorrow, everything would be solved. Now, you needed to rest up for the day ahead.

[kehideni]

Another one of them GW2 fanfictions Caithe x Commander

This is no-lore fun stuff for me to practice romantic scenes and whatnot because my ace ass gets hives just from thinking about writing romantic stories and i really need to start building immunity to it because as much as i like to write sometimes, people for some reason only seem to care if it got shippy stuff in it.

SO!!!

In the spirit of “damn Beasteye Denalien you got it bad, too bad for you your love interest is unavailable to you(atleast he thinks so)” here’s a little puke inducing i-don’t-even-know-what-this-is.

To not step on them lesbian toes, lemme clarify that i actually ship the general Commander character with Caithe not any specific Commander and only write her with my Commander(who happens to be male) because i know my Commander the best. (Also Caithe can be pansexual for all we know, we never got official clarification on her sexuality (i’m guessing precisely so players can play around with her idea more.))

This is... the dreaded Caithe x Commander fic:

OH, RIGHT! If the fic fits your Commander feel free to imagine them here instead of mine.

[Before i start i just want to note to you guys how freakin’ long i was sitting here staring at the screen because i had no opening scene envisioned. Goes to show i’m not a writer just a hobbist.]

 This was bad... really, REALLY bad. Well, to be fair it wasn’t anything serious like another Elder Dragon awakening to destroy Tyria, no. It was more along the lines of “no fahrar ever prepares you for this sort of vulnerability” bad.

 The commander - a big, dark furred, muscular charr - was figuratively cowering because in his paws he was holding an invitation to some sort of human “ball”. “Whatever that entails...”  he thought grimly, his dislike screams from his face. 

 Nah... he is Ash Legion, being well informed of other races’ culture is part of his identity. Ohh, he knew exactly what it is.

 “Wooo, you know you can just decline, right?” the one who delivered him the invitation personally was none other than Logan Thackeray, a friend who he shared battles with countless times.

 “I know i can... doesn’t mean i should.” the charr flipped the invitation over, examining the front page of it. It was well crafted, the letters shone with the light’s reflection. His name shining with big, bold letters, he almost felt like it was a taunt. “I mean the Queen herself invited me and i can already hear my Imperator say: You’re going, and keep our good relation with the humans rolling!”

 Logan laughed up at that “I appreciate the rhyme! Can i put your furry behind on the list then or not?”

 The Commander sighed. “yeah... yeah...” 

“Great! You are supposed to bring a plus one!”

Another great sigh. “Oooof course i’m supposed to... Who are you gonna bring, Logan?”

 The Seraph gave a cruel little grin “I’m affraid no one.” he replied with the cheekiest voice. “I’ll be on guard duty, protecting your lionhide so that you can finally have a break from all the fighting and worrying.”

“WHAT?! I’m a charr!! I don’t need a break from fighting! I’m literally bred to fight!” the Commander grabbed his face in both his paws, this can’t be happening! “This isn’t a ploy to prank me is it? You’d tell me if this was some elaborate prank, right?”

 Logan just laughed more “I would, I would! But it’s not a prank! It’s just one way we humans relax and create bonds.”

The Commander didn’t seem that impressed. “Right...”

“Anyway, it was nice to see you outside of the battlefield for once, Commander! I gotta go and deliver the other invitations too, see you on the battle field of looove!” Logan couldn’t help but laugh even as he was departing.

“Kalla... help me...”

_______________________

“Sorry Commander, you should have known Kas and I are going together.”

_______________________

“Your Imperator forces you to go too, huh? I’ll see you there, Cre said i’m her partner and to suck it up.”

_______________________

“You got an invite too? I’m going with Braham, it’s been so long since we hung out. It’ll be like old times, only this time hopefully no Scarlet...”

“BWAHAHAHAHAH, we will make sure to make fun of you and whoever you bring, boss!”

*bonk* ���OUCH alright, ALRIGHT! Watch it, i still have stiches!”

“Serves you right, Braham.”

_______________________

“Yyyyeah, no, sorry... Gorrik and I have better things to do. Research won’t research itself!”

_______________________

With a big heave Denalien sat down on the edge of the scrying pool, Aurene observing him.

“You seem to be in a bad mood.” the ethereal voice of Aurene reached him in his mind.

“Ugh... i’m supposed to invite someone to this human ball where i’m gonna have to do humanly stuff like “smalltalk” and “dance”. I don’t do smalltalk and dance! Most of all, i don’t have anyone i’d WANT to dance with!”

“...That... sounds like a lie...”

That gave the Commander a pause.

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Well... you know how you can feel whatever i feel, right? It goes both ways and you feel different around different people. Like... for example...”

“NO! No! Don’t say it!”

“You were aware?”

 The Commander pawed at his face in frustration.

“Why don’t you ask her? I’m sure she’d say yes.”

Denalien was starting to growl and the growl slowly built up to a roar.

RRRRAAAAAAAGGGHH “NO!”

When the room quited down from the echo, one could hear that someone was walking up behind the Commander.

“Is this a bad time?” the charr leaped to his feet in fright. Ohh no...

“Caithe! Hi! What brings you here?”

“Hi! Actually you do, Commander. I wanted to ask you something.”

“No, no, nononononononononnononononono no, by Pyre’s bow PLEASE don’t ask what i think you want to ask.”

“You see i got this invitation from Queen Jennah-”

“I did too!” the Commander rudely interrupted her in hopes that maybe she’d forget what she wanted to ask.

 Poor Caithe, just watched in puzzlement but then continued.

 “Uh, i heard you don’t have a partner to go with, and i don’t have anyone either so i thought, as the two champions of Aurene, it’d be fitting to go together?” bless her heart, she looked just as nervous as the Commander.

 Ubeknownst to her, this is the scenario that the Commander wanted to avoid at all costs. But riddle me this: How does one tell the other that they love them wholeheartedly but is unable to imagine them being together and thus going to a ball where they will have to dance would make things awkward for them? You know... without actually saying those words.

 “Caithe, isn’t there someone you’d rather go with?”

 That seemed to hurt her feelings. QUICK! REPHRASE!

 “No! I mean, you might not like going with me, i’m... uhh a bad dancer.” Which was a half-truth, although he is not a great dancer he could dance, but he really needed to give her a reason to reconsider and this was the first thing to pop into his head!

 It seemed to smooth things over quickly though, because she is chuckling now.

 “Is that all? Whoever you’d ask to go with would have to work with your bad dancing too, you know!” her mirth died down a bit. “I can teach you to dance here and now, don’t worry!”

 AAAARRGGGHH

-pft...

-Are you mind-laughing at me, Aurene?!

-yes.

-...She can’t hear this, right?

-Not unless i want her to.

-phew...

-Just accept her invitation already! She’s waiting!

“Alright... fine. We can go together.”

 He got no other reply than a genuine smile, and a hand reaching out for him to take. At first he didn’t understand, but soon he realised that Caithe means to act on her word to teach him how to dance now. With an unseen sigh of defeat he gave his clawed hands to hers, let her do as she pleases. She won.

“We don’t have music here but the important thing is to make your step - which is supposed to mirror the step of your partner - to the rythm of the song.”

Beasteye Denalien: beastmaster, bow-expert, professional spy, the great Commander of the pact, God-killer, Dragonslayer. His greatest fear?

Having to dance with the one he loves.

“You seem to be a natural at this! Why were you so worried?”

Caithe is an legendary spy herself, the Commander knew he can’t lie to her so he opted to tell a truth... a slightly unrelated truth.

“When i was younger i had tried to woo someone with my maaad dancing skills, but she wasn’t into it i guess.” Ok so this was a half truth again, he didn’t try to woo that someone, just simply prove that he can dance. It was a dance battle he lost to a female charr back in the fahrar.

 Caithe laughed at that again- a lot of people were laughing at him today for some reason. “Sorry, it’s just hard to imagine you trying to impress someone with dancing. You don’t seem like the type that has to struggle for attention.”

“I’m really not cut out for courtships, i just don’t understand how to get someone to be interested in me that way.” This was a 100% true. Aurene kept watch of the two, it seems they forgot they were still dancing. She found it adorable, she imagined this must be what a child feels like as they watch their parents interact with each other.

 “There are tricks and tactics for that, similar in principle to traps of combat.” Was she bringing herself closer to the Commander? She was staring intently in his eyes and the poor charr couldn’t remove his from hers.

SPLASH

Neither of them noticed the scrying pool’s edge in time. Aurene was laughing as both surfaced.

They looked at each other, and for the first time that day the Commander was laughing with everyone else around him.

_______________________

"Introducing the two Champions of Aurene: The Commander of the Pact, Beasteye Denalien and the Leader of the Crystal Bloom, Caithe of the firstborn sylvari.”

 “Ugh, in charr society you speak for yourself, introduce yourself. No need for spokespeople.”

 As he walked around arm in arm with Caithe he saw his extended “warband”. Braham and Rox seemed to raid every snack bar as if they were in a race to see which of them could eat their own weight in fingerfood, Kas and Jory were talking about something with Countess Anise, Crecia and Rytlock were near the Queen, probably talking politics, and was that a glimpse of Canach that the charr caught? Huh, who knew...

 Caithe seemed to be looking around as well.

“Looking for someone?”

“No, just assessing the perimeter. A thief can’t be caught unguarded, you know.”

“Hehh, i’m Ash. I know. One should always be aware of their surroundings.”

“And be several steps before any unseen enemies.”

 This must have been one of the reasons the Commander unknowingly fell for her. She was every bit as sneaky and careful as any other Ash charr. Unlike the cold reputation of the Ash Legion the Commander knew he was “soft”, and he came to learn that Caithe too, holds those she loves close to her heart, despite her reputation as a thief. When the Commander realised she was so alike to him back then before Aurene hatched, he knew he was not facing a simple puppy-crush. Eversince then he knew he was in love with her, but...

 He is charr, and she is sylvari. The cultures of which they come from are just too different, and Caithe never showed signs of that sort of interest in him either. Whenever he felt he could get closer to her, his mind bombarded him with doubt. They are different species, he doesn’t have time, she’s not interested, it’s just a matter of time when he falls in battle for the final time, she’s branded which means probably immortal, he’s physically just so much bigger than her- there always was something.

His line of thought got interrupted by the Queen.

“Esteemed guests, people of Divinity’s Reach! The opportunity has come to share a dance with your partner, please enjoy yourselves!”

 A slow melody started to decorate the atmosphere, there was a small tug at his right sleeve.

 “Let me see if you still remember what i taught you.” Caithe offered her hand.

 They weren’t long in the dance when the Commander heard Braham laugh. By the time he looked at the norn, Rox softly slapped his neck though- enough warning to stop laughing. 

He realised more and more people started to look at them. “Why aren’t THEY dancing?”  But rather than joining in the dance, people started to murmur.

Caithe noticed that the Commander was agitated by the onlookers, even the Commander can be shy sometimes.

“Remember how we talked about tricks and tactics?”

The Commander looked at Caithe. “Yeah.”

“Want to know a trick i know, to catch someone’s interest?”

Denalien wasn’t so sure he did, but atleast it takes his mind off of the staring crowd.

“Sure.”

“One of the tricks is prolonged eyecontact. The longer, and steadier you keep eyecontact with your target, the more likely they will eventually feel some sort of bond with you.”

What was that implying... Burn him, he can’t look away from her eyes.

________________

“They are not even dancing now, they are just spinning while hugging!” Braham was still stuffing his face when Rox bumped him to take a look at where she was pointing.

“Real tackful, Braham!” 

[freebooter4ever]

Hello I just finished the Pacific and I'm dying. So it's time for me to delve into the fandom and try and fulfil my poor sledgefu heart. Have any recommendations on who's blog to look at or tags? Other than yourself because I most certainly will spend a solid 5 hours going through your tags. I've already seen a lot of your art and I think it's beautiful, just an FYI.

Oh boy do I ever have recs! It was only about a year ago that I was new to the fandom myself and slowly going through @aboutthatmelancholystorm and @persipneiwrites tumblr sledgefu tags every night, reading all of it, and being totally sucked in! ^_^ (I especially suggest Persipnei’s 3:16 AU where Sledge and Snafu are rock stars!) As for art, I think the biggest collection I know of is the blog @marines-r-gay. Some of my favorite sledgefu artist blogs include @skelesocks (Ace Eugene will hold a special place in my heart forever!) @badgerms and my old favorite the-heebiejeebies who sadly disappeared and deleted their blog :( but you can still find their old art in my ‘sledgefu’ tag on my blog like here. There’s no really ‘exculsively’ sledgefu artists out there right now, but there is a LOT of amazing older stuff to be found mixed into people’s blogs! My own art/writing sledgefu masterlist can be found here.

More specific fanfic recs under the cut! I’m focusing on oldies, because I think it’s fairly easy to find the newer ones on AO3 that are still being updated ^_^

Not Quite Home by Seabright - A fix it fic that really fixes things. Post war set in New Orleans with Eugene showing up on Snafu’s doorstep. Snafu is cantankerous and very in character and he /claims/ he can’t ‘fix’ Sledge, but let’s face it that’s why they need to fix each other. Snafu has a lot of walls up and Eugene breaks all of them down in his steadfast way. This fic captures Snafu perfectly - even in little things like in the way he fidgets and moves. Also the last kiss is just...SO good.

Canon Compliant

Roadverse by Seabright - There are a few authors exclusively on AO3 that like...if you haven’t read their entire sledgefu collection yet, you gotta! Seabright is one of them. Roadverse is set after the war and Snafu takes Eugene on a roadtrip to Florida, there’s a lot of introspection, they fall in love, definitely a happy ending! The writing here is what really shines.

After The Happy Ending by Handdaddyhoosier - Another author it’s worth reading their entire sledgefu collection. This one is also set after the war and is more domestic. A lot of fluff, a lot of slice of life, a lot of Sledge and Snafu dealing with homophobia and overcoming it (!!). Through it all Snafu and Eugene remain sooooo much in love that they’re stronger together and...yeah...it’s good. 

Christmas Even Will Find Me by SOMETHINREAL - My favorite canon compliant Sledgefu Christmas fic! It’s just perfect! Everybody is all together again after the war for Christmas and Eugene and Snafu are playing their own little dance between each other in the corner...they’re adorable. Plus there’s a happy ending!

Maybe You’ll Think Of Me When You’re All Alone by SOMETHINREAL - A very very good fix it fic for after the war. They’re both broken but they’re together and falling in love all over again, yay! I live for first pining and emotional kiss scenes and this is one of the best!

These Foolish Things Remind Me of You by Spoondragon - Merriell is quirky and weird and collects things and his last line in the fic is gOLD. Basically them being cute, with a first kiss. I highly rec ALL of spoondragon’s sledgefu fics!

To Make Much of Time by Hueligan - FIX THE TRAIN SCENE. I will read almost any variation of that train scene where Snafu makes it right, and this one does! AND THEN RUINS IT. So fair warning, you will fall in love with this fic but then it will break your heart. Kinda like Snafu. But it’s ok cause then you can go read one of the OTHER many fix it fics and mend it again.

Tilled Earth by Killerqueenie - Okay, this is one of my absolute FAVORITES. Snafu finds Eugene playing farmer boy in a small town outside of Mobile ten years after the war and Snafu signs himself on as a ranch hand. This one ACTUALLY fixes the train scene. Eugene is prickly and untrusting and Snafu has to earn his right to waltz back into his life. And oh gosh the love each other so so much!

The Magic Helmet by jspringsteen - Cute adorable and totally in character, canon compliant and not actually sledgefu except for some delightful hints that they are into each other more than they let on. It’s just such a great moment for Snafu’s character that I’ve reread this on multiple occasions.

All You Got by ssstrychnine - Another fix it fic (I know, I love these). This follows canon so well it’s seamless and only adds subtle touches of love between Gene and Snafu - so very believable as a part of the actual show. This author has four fics on AO3 for sledgefu and I suggest reading them all!

The Jazz Lights of New Orleans by Gracefully - Yet ANOTHER fix it fic! Give me them all!!! 

AU

Like It’s Only You And Me by SJTrinity - Snafu is an artist in this so of course I’m going to biased, but this is one of my absolute favorite college AU’s. All our favorite characters are there, including Bill, Burgie, Andy, and Eddie (and even Pops! as a fatherly figure to Snafu though he’s only referenced). Snafu is as chaotic as ever. The romance is hot! There are parts where I almost bust a gut laughing. Also anytime Eugene gets all haughty and bossy with his little furrowed brow over Snafu that’s like A+ for me.

Learning Curve by Seabright - ok THIS fic defines ultimate pining over Gene for me. I have never related to Snafu more. There’s a description of Eugene swimming in a pool that just..yeah...I have feelings. Anyway, it’s a college AU that is tragically UNFINISHED and will rip your heart out, BUT the same author also has a whole bunch of more canon related fic where the two of them do get together, so that eases the sting a little. 

F.M.L by @badgerms - I maybe have a thing for swimmers, but I love this swimming college AU especially because it’s in Gene’s POV but done so well that it feels real. This fic also delves into mental illness and mental self flagellation (there are some moments that hit REAL hard if you’ve ever had eating disorders). But on top of all that, I feel like lollki really captured what is so magnetic about Snafu, and by having Gene put him on this impossible pedestal it kinda reflects what a lot of us in the fandom do with his character. Snafu makes his existence look effortless and thoughtless, Gene is incredibly jealous of how Snafu just lives, their competition is ENTHRALLING.

The Kind Of Stuff That Only Prince Would Sing About  by @stolperzunge A coffee shop AU that has Sledge and Snafu just slowly and sweetly falling in love. This one is from Snaf’s pov and since I identify with him more you know I’m gonna love it lol! There are some GREAT funny lines, Snafu has personality in spades. Eugene is a grandad hipster type who also writes erotica....I dunno it’s all amazing go read it.

There Will Be Better Days by SydneyCarton - High school AU. As someone who had a fairly shitty high school experience and many bad holidays, this is...cathartic. Gene is definitely more the caretaker here, he saves Snafu in a way that’s just as strong as when he picked him up on the battlefield. But it’s all emotional, and Snafu is this scared prickly kid. And Gene is the honor roll kid who has to play the role of best friend secretly in love with the one person who matters most to them. This author never wrote anything else for Sledgefu and I wish they had!

Okay, that’s a whole bunch! There’s even more in my aO3 bookmarks! This list is just me going through my bookmarks and selecting the ones that I especially remembered and is by no means exhaustive of all my favorites in this fandom. Joining the Pacific train late means there’s a whole lot to choose from and explore...but it also means the list of active blogs is short and not a lot of new content gets posted every day :( I think the Sledgefu community is still going pretty strong, though! Welcome!

[bloody-wonder]

Every time I read a fic where Nicky just inexplicably ~understands~ Andrew or is the one to explain Andrew’s actions *TO* Neil, my suspension of disbelief automatically snaps. I get that people want to like Nicky and therefore make their versions of him more palatable for themselves, but it’s annoying. That’s not who he is. He doesn’t make any more of an effort to understand Andrew than anyone else and he doesn’t have an inate knack for it either, which some fics would have me believe

the all consuming, uncritical, absolutely blind love for nicky in the fandom is one of my biggest pet peeves. welcome to another rant.

i remember when i read aftg for the first time and dived into the tumblr fandom i very much expected to see posts calling him out at for what he did during their first trip to eden’s bcs isn’t it the bread and butter of tumblr discourse - taking one problematic thing a character did and cancelling them for it forever. however i was surprised to find not a single such post. seriously i’ve been in the fandom for almost a year now and i have been lurking on the old blogs and following the new ones and i have yet to see such a post. here’s the one i wrote back then

https://bloody-wonder.tumblr.com/post/189107928398/so-nicky-discourse

there i mostly talk about the eden’s incident but the point i tried (and probably failed) to get across was not that what he did is Problematic but rather that why he did it is. bcs like with roland it’s self-evident that nicky did a bad thing and it’s also framed as such by the narrative. but taken out of context this single incident can be easily dismissed as a mistake commited by a young inebriated person which they realized was a mistake and apologized for. the fandom is certainly ready to dismiss it and to accept nicky’s apology to neil. fair enough. in fact it would be an example of some very mature thinking on the part of the fandom - if the context of nicky’s behavior and personality wasn’t discarded along the way.

and the context is this: nicky has very rigid and one-sided views about what’s normal and what’s not and he acts accordingly. he thinks it’s normal to feel attraction like he does and to strive for a romantic relationship - hence the “neil you have to date someone or you’ll die unhappy” pep talk. he thinks it’s normal to casually kiss a guy he likes at a club despite him being very obviously uninterested. he thinks it’s normal to comfort people by touching them, so he will do it to andrew although it’s common knowledge that andrew doesn’t like to be touched. when andrew lashes out at him for it - it must mean andrew’s not normal bcs “normal” people like to be touched. andrew doesn’t behave like a “normal” person would, ergo andrew’s crazy. how do we “fix” andrew? how do we make him “normal” again? apparently by forcing “normal” things and behaviors upon him until he’s magically healed by the abundance of care and hugs.

instead of trying to understand andrew and connect with him “from below”, he’s dead set on imposing “normalcy” on him “from above”. like i said in my old post, he doesn’t even seem to give andrew credit for defending him against those jerks and winding up on the pills bcs of it. nicky just doesn’t get andrew to the point of calling him soulles, but seems to be under the illusion that he does everything in his power to understand him. well, on second thought, is it in his power though? i had some hope that after nicky finds out about the nature of andrew’s trauma, he’ll realize some things and his treatment of andrew will change. that didn’t happen as far as i remember. when the gang returns from the easthaven with andrew, nicky’s like “andrew won’t you ask neil why he’s all beaten up? well that’s just rude”. in fact, now i’m remembering that nicky and aaron were telling everybody that andrew’s much worse when sober but?? what’s worse about him? that he isn’t smiling at them? what a scary behavior indeed. or that he isn’t chatting with them? well it’s their problem that they aren’t as stellar conversationalists as neil. i digress. what i’m getting at is that it may very much be not in nicky’s power to understand andrew bcs they are very differend people and come from different circumstances. i’m not saying that you can’t write a plausible arc where nicky learns to communicate with andrew but most people don’t even try. as far as i understand nicky is seen as nothing but kind and if sometimes he makes mistakes, well, they don’t count bcs his intentions are good. but there’s a road paved with good intentions. you know where it leads.

that’s the insidious thing about nicky, that’s why i think he’s one of the most well-crafted morally grey characters and why he fills me with rage - the problematic side of him is hidden beneath the good intentions, the kindness, the jokes, all the other little things that make him nice and relatable, that the fandoms tend to latch on to. we have no problem engaging with characters like andrew critically, it’s easy for us to separate his good sides from his flaws bcs he’s upfront about it. we sure love andrew but we don’t romanticize his bad boy attitude and his knives bcs the media shift in recent years has taught us that “bad” boys tend to be Problematic and you have to watch out. andrew is hard to swallow so you swallow only if you absolutely want to, but nicky is so palatable you don’t even have to drink anything to wash him down, all the while oblivious to what you just swallowed. the “good” boys you have to be critical of as well.

sorry, this metaphor was weird.

lastly, we have to address the elephant in the room - nicky’s gay as the fourth of july. he’s the uwu gay cinnamon roll that has to be protected at all costs. we’re still at a point where, despite gradually getting more and more media rep, gay people feel like the characters they’re represented by have to be paragons of virtue lest the general public think that all gays are like this one imperfect character. so i can see how the aftg fans would want to overlook all nicky’s flaws because they like him and relate to him so much. i can also see how, if he were straight but otherwise retained the uuh... lets say “sexually enthusiastic” facet of his canon personality, he’d probably be burned at a stake by now. there’s this wonderful trend where people rehabilitate seth and aaron by treating them as complex characters. i can only hope that the same thing will happen to nicky some time soon.

so yeah, i 100% agree with all you said. nicky doesn’t understand andrew and the fics where he magically does are ooc. or, you know, those where nicky explains demisexuality to neil. don’t. make. me. laugh. nicky who has forced himself on neil and when that ended in a disaster tried to allo-splain the joys of a romantic relationship to him? nicky, who, upon seeing that neil doesn’t seem to be interested in girls, thought that the only possible conclusion must be that neil’s gay? all of this after neil explicitly told him that he doesn’t “swing”. i’m sorry, writers who hc nicky as some kind of wisened by life sexuality mentor, but he doesn’t know a thing about the ace spectrum.

tl;dr nicky really needs to do some self-reflection but, since he isn’t a real person but a fictional character, the readers need to reflect upon his canon behavior instead, before declaring him to be the kindest, most perceptive and tolerant person in existence. 

[justheretobreakthings]

Kings Over Aces - Chapter 2

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Word Count: 3,114 (Total Word Count: 6,290) Read on AO3

Story Summary:

The Voltron Coalition has an alliance in the works with the resource-rich planet of Yuipra, and it’s the paladins’ job to keep on the king’s good side while the deal is made. That shouldn’t shouldn’t be too great a challenge; after all, they’ve courted plenty of planets before for the sake of alliances.

Unfortunately, things are made much more complicated when the king takes a special interest in Keith.

Fic content warnings for attempted rape/non-con.

“I’m telling you, he wants me,” Lance said, for what was probably the dozenth time since breakfast.

Pidge rolled her eyes, stretching her leg out along the couch to kick Lance where he was seated on the opposite cushion without moving from where she’d comfortably settled with her tablet. The paladins were spending their downtime after training this morning in the lounge, all having claimed their usual spots to relax, but Lance harping on about last night’s dinner was making it even more difficult than usual - which was saying something, as the weirdly translated Altean books Keith tried to pass time with were hard enough to focus on anyway. “He does not ‘want’ you,” she said. “You think every person we ever meet at these coalition things ‘wants’ you, and how many times has that been the case?”

“Plenty of times,” Lance answered. “I’m not gonna be able to keep track exactly.”

“It’s sort of a numbers game by this point, isn’t it?” Hunk asked, tilting his head back from where he was seated cross-legged on the floor in front of the other two to join the conversation. “You flirt with basically every single person you find attractive - ”

“ - And your standards for that aren’t exactly sky-high,” said Pidge, “So you’ve probably hit on like five hundred people since we got shot out into space. Which would make your success rate - ”

“All right, I see where this math is going,” Lance groaned. “For your information, I do not flirt with nearly that many people.”

“Good point,” Pidge said. “Just winking and making finger guns probably doesn’t count. Or at least only counts as, like, half a flirt.”

“It’s not - you know what, whatever. We’re not talking about my overall track record, just last night. And that king was totally into me. Basically talked just to me the entire night. You saw, right, Keith?” He turned to Keith, who silently cursed his inability to turn invisible. “Back me up here.”

“Um,” Keith said. “Well, you certainly talked to him a lot.”

“I was replying to him, that’s how conversations work. But he was totally flirting with me, right?”

“Uh…”

Lance huffed and crossed his arms. “Okay, that doesn’t count for anything. Keith probably wouldn’t recognize flirting if his life depended on it.” Keith let out a little harrumph of indignation. Sure, that was true, but there was no need to just announce it like that.

“Nah, I’m gonna go ahead and take his testimony as gospel,” Pidge said. “Sorry, Lance. You bombed.”

“Need me to get Kaltenecker to make you some ice cream?” Hunk asked, reaching up to pat Lance on the leg.

“I’m like two seconds away from slapping all of you.”

“The bitter sting of rejection is such an ugly look on you,” Pidge said drily. A small beep sounded from her tablet, and a moment later, she sat up. “Allura just messaged. They’re getting an incoming signal from Yuipra, we’re probably gonna solidify alliance terms. Gotta go join ‘em in the bridge.”

Lance groaned. “Why do we all have to go? Shiro and Allura are in charge of all of that.”

“I dunno, to make a good impression?” Pidge stretched as she stood from the couch. “Besides, you should be excited. Get another chance to talk to the love of your life.”

“At no point did I ever say anything about him being the ‘love of my life’,” Lance said as he and Hunk reluctantly stood too. “All I said was that he wants me. Which I still maintain is one hundred percent true.”

“If you say so. You coming, Keith?”

“Yeah, I’m coming,” Keith said. He shut off his electric reader and dropped it onto the seat to come back to later before joining the others, shuffling in behind them for the short walk to the bridge.

When they arrived, joining Allura and Shiro on the deck, the holoscreen was already on and tuned to an image of King Olren, the arms of two of his ever-present guards just on the edges of the frame. The discussion was already in motion, but Olren paused mid-sentence as the door to the bridge slid open.

“Ah, the rest of your paladins have arrived, I see,” he said, smiling down at them as they took their places on the bridge. “It is a delight to see you all again.”

“You too, your majesty,” Hunk said.

Allura smiled as she looked back over her shoulder at the others. “King Olren was just telling us that he was quite impressed by our performance yesterday, as well as our engagement with his people at the banquet.”

“Quite so,” Olren said with a nod. “Your presence went over very well amongst my nobility. And, of course, I was just as enamored by Voltron as anyone in my court. Your knowledge and passion are obvious. Now, I’ve spent the morning reviewing the terms of our potential alliance with my advisors. Yuipra’s stance on interplanetary relations is perfectly in line with your current mission statement of resistance against the Galra empire and liberation of those under its control. However, I must confess slight apprehension over how the citizenry would respond to engaging in a conflict in which we are currently not directly involved. As your proposed terms are outlined right now, the use of our resources versus the coalition benefits that you would grant us in return seem rather unbalanced.”

“That’s only in the short term,” Shiro spoke up. “We may currently be thin on benefits, but that’s entirely due to past Galra occupation that we are working to wipe out. Already we’re seeing the signs of environmental improvements and economic growth from planets that have been liberated and are being helped by the Coalition now. The trade agreements and political relations we build now will yield positive growth over time, and in the long run it’ll more than offset the costs of your involvement.”

“And you have evidence to back your claims of long-term benefits?”

“I would be more than happy to send you any details about the Coalition’s fiscal plans and projections of resource growth that you need,” said Allura. “You will find that we have been nothing but meticulous.”

Olren nodded. “That would do nicely, Princess, if you would be so kind. I must admit, your confidence alone is quite the sales pitch.” Allura lifted her chin, a proud smile on her lips, and Olren grinned back. “The rapid creation and propagation of the Voltron coalition makes ever more sense. It’s certainly likely that Yuipra will have its part in it as you make history.”

“We thank you, your majesty,” Allura said.

“I am still not, however, quite ready yet to solidify an alliance with your coalition,” Olren continued, and Allura deflated. “Not due to problems with any stipulations we’ve laid out as yet, but because I like to know those with whom I ally on a more… personal level, you see. It is one thing to be able to ally with someone politically, but such bonds are far more meaningful, not to mention harder to break, when they are personalized to a nigh emotional level. Wouldn’t you agree?”

Allura paused a moment before answering, “Well - well, yes, of course. I completely understand where you are coming from.”

“Excellent. Now, I’ve gotten a bit of a chance to gain some familiarity during our banquet, but if Voltron would be so willing to indulge me, I really prefer to do so more privately. One-on-one, actually.”

“All right,” Allura said slowly. “So, erm, what, exactly, are you proposing?”

“Suppose I’ll get right down to it,” Olren said through a little breath of a laugh. “I wish to host an intimate dinner in my private dining room tomorrow evening. And I would like your red paladin to accompany me as my date.”

Lance cast the others a grin - a smirk that seemed to say, I told you so - before he stepped forward and bowed grandly. “Your majesty,” he said as he straightened up, “It would be an honor to - ”

“No, no, not him,” Olren said, waving a hand dismissively. “The red paladin.”

“I am the red - ” Lance started, before his face fell and his eyes widened. “Wait, do you mean - are you - are you talking about Keith?!” he spluttered, gesturing with his thumb toward Keith, who stood in stunned silence as all the eyes in the room spun toward him.

“Yes. Keith,” Olren said with a smile. “I do hope you will accept my invitation?”

“Uh - I - I - ” Keith stammered out.

“Is, ah, is that really necessary?” Shiro asked. “Voltron functions as a unit, you see, and there’s no need to have only one of us to dinner rather than the whole group.”

“If you function as a unit, then your red paladin’s character should reflect that of all of you,” Olren said. “You need not worry, really, over the effect on our potential alliance. I must admit, I’ve found myself quite taken with his disposition already. But you do understand why I may want to take the time to personally assure myself that we will be a good match, yes?”

“Understandable, yes,” Allura said. “I’m sure that we can arrange - ” She paused as she glanced back over her shoulder at Keith, whose knees were growing shaky and who had long since felt his face heating into a bright red.

Allura furrowed her brow and turned back toward Olren. “Could you please grant us a few doboshes to discuss our availability?” she asked. “We will be happy to resume this conversation shortly.”

“Of course,” Olren said. “I look forward to a call. And I must admit, I do expect to like what I hear. I’m not in the habit of taking ‘no’ for an answer.” He cast them all one last smile before his holoscreen went dark and then disappeared.

Allura let out a breath before turning around toward Keith. “Keith,” she said. “Are you ill?”

Keith blinked at her. “Am I… what?”

“You look ill.”

Slowly he shook his head. “No, I’m - I’m not sick.”

“Because if you have any sort of bug that the king might catch, that would certainly not reflect well, nor be ideal for you and your state of mind during a dinner. Or if something in their meal disagreed with you - ”

“It’s just, um - this is - he said.” Keith took a deep breath. “He said - he said he wanted me to be his date.”

“Yes?” Allura said. “And?”

“And, well, I, uh - I don’t - I don’t really have - ” Allura tilted her head, and Keith took a deep breath before finishing, “I don’t date.”

“Oh for the love of - ” Lance groaned. “Of course. Of course Mullet’s never been on a date before. We should’ve known.”

“Is that all?” Allura asked. “Keith, I’m sure it won’t be much of a problem. Everyone gets nervous the first time they go on a date. We could always go through some etiquette with you, some conversation starters. We’ll no doubt have to brief you on a number of courting customs anyway, seeing as nobility is rather more particular in how they go about it, but I’m certain that - ”

“No, look, that’s not it,” Keith interrupted. “It’s - it’s not that I haven’t dated. I mean, I, um, I haven’t, but it isn’t - it’s just that, I don’t date.”

“I’m… not sure I follow,” Allura said.

With a grunt of frustration, Keith brought a hand up to card his fingers through his hair as he searched for the words to explain it in a way she’d understand. “I just - I don’t do that, I - I don’t feel the things that people are supposed to feel when - when they’re on dates, like, the romance and all, they - they don’t - ”

“Hang on,” Pidge interrupted, lifting a hand and peering at him with narrowed eyes through her glasses. “Keith, are you aro?”

Keith felt his voice halt in his throat, and he crossed his arms and took a step back, ducking his head a little as he closed in on himself and avoided looking at his teammates’ faces. It wasn’t that he thought they’d react badly to it, or judge him for it - at least, he sure hoped they wouldn’t. It was just that this was personal, and he much would’ve preferred to come out when he was actually ready to, not just… like this.

But, of course, now that it was out there, it was out there. Not like there was any point in denying it. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “Um, aroace, to be specific, but, uh, yeah. Yeah.”

He dared a glance up beneath his lashes. Pidge was nodding slowly in understanding, and Shiro was more or less expressionless - he’d already known, after all. The others all just appeared to be confused.

“I’m sorry, arrow?” Allura said. “Pidge, what is that?”

“Aro. Short for aromantic,” Pidge answered. “Means he doesn’t feel romantic attraction.”

“Wait, for real?” Lance said, his brow wrinkling and his eyes scanning Keith up and down as if looking for some sort of clue on his clothes to verify it.

“Yes, for real,” Keith snapped. “Why the fuck would I lie about something like that?”

Lance lifted his hands innocently. “Shit, man, I wasn’t accusing you of lying. Just, you know, processing the new information. Guess that kinda clears up some of the rumors that were going around the Garrison…”

For a moment Keith was about to demand some follow-up about these rumors, but decided to let it go for now. He’d overheard plenty of gossip about himself as a student on every other subject - whether he cheated on the sims and how he did it, how he got into the Garrison, his juvie history, his relationship to Shiro, his family. A couple rumors about his sexuality were a mere drop in the bucket. It wasn’t important now.

What was important was the matter at hand: the dinner date with King Olren. “Look, the point is, I don’t do the whole ‘dating’ thing. It’s - it’s not my thing. I wouldn’t be able to pull it off.”

Allura crossed her arms, tapping her finger pensively against her elbow. “Well, what if we trained you on it?”

Keith frowned at her. “What?”

“On dating. I’m sure we’d be able to give you sufficient instruction to handle a single dinner date. If we trained you, do you think you’d be able to manage?”

Keith took a step back. “Allura, I told you, I don’t feel - ”

“I know, I understand. I’m not asking you to be attracted to him. I know you can’t control that. But I also know that this could be a very advantageous alliance for Voltron, and a date with you seems to be the deciding factor. Would it be at all possible for you to, er… fake it?”

“Fake it?” Keith repeated incredulously.

“Yeah, yeah, that could work,” Lance said, nodding. “I mean, that’s not exactly hard to pull off, right? I’ve faked my way through dates before. You know, I meet someone online, but when I show up to the restaurant for a date it turns out they’re a total weirdo, so I smile through the dinner and make small talk and just sorta, like, humor them. Let them have a nice evening then get the fuck outta there.”

“What, you can’t just be up front about not liking them?”

“It’s called manners, Mullet.”

“Look, I’m not going to - ”

“They do kind of have a point, Keith,” Shiro interrupted.

Keith turned to him, taken aback. If anyone knew how uncomfortable Keith was over the concept of dating, it would be Shiro. Keith had only even learned about aromanticism and asexuality because Shiro had explained them to him, back in their Galaxy Garrison days, and his surrogate brother had held his hand tightly through the process of coming out for the first time. So him saying that Allura and Lance ‘had a point’ about sending him on a date… it was unexpected, to say the very least. “Shiro?” he said. “You - you think I should…”

“Keith, I’m not saying you need to, uh, take it very far,” Shiro said slowly. “I know you’ve got your boundaries, and I respect them. It’s just, well, it isn’t as though Olren is asking for your hand in marriage or anything. All he’s requested is a dinner date. I realize that it wouldn’t be a comfortable experience, but one awkward evening in exchange for all the resources Yuipra can offer… It would be a shame to have to pass it up.”

“Exactly,” said Allura, giving Shiro a grateful nod. “There’s no need to make it a bigger deal than it is. One dinner date. That’s all.”

“I mean, Olren’s certainly not my type either,” Shiro said with a shrug. “But if it was me he’d asked after, well, I wouldn’t love it, but I’d take one for the team, you know?”

Something rolled in Keith’s stomach and he swallowed down a lump in his throat. That was true. Shiro would do this without hesitation. Hell, even if it had been a woman asking, which would definitely leave Shiro uncomfortable to all get out, he would take the fall. Because that’s what he does - he makes sacrifices for his team. That’s what a leader does. And Keith was the leader now.

One date, he repeated mentally. He could handle just one date, surely. For Voltron’s sake.

“All right,” he said, his voice coming out sounding quieter and dryer than he would have liked. “All right, I’ll, uh, I’ll do it. You can let him know.”

Allura let out a breath of relief and smiled at him. “Thank you, Keith. I’ll get a missive off to him at once, and we can start training.”

“You know what I still don’t understand?” Lance said as Allura turned away toward her podium.

“What?” asked Keith.

“This guy had a dinner with our whole team,” Lance said. “He was sitting at the same table as Shiro and Allura and, well, me… and he goes for Keith. I just don’t get it.”

“Lance,” Shiro said with a frown.

“Look, I’m just saying what we’re all thinking. It’s not like he didn’t have options. He actually chose to thirst after the mullet. Out of everyone there. This was a conscious decision on his part.”

“Everyone has their own tastes.”

“It’s like if he’d gone to an art museum and decided that his favorite exhibit was the bathroom door.”

“That’s enough, Lance,” Shiro scolded.

Lance shook his head. “I dunno, man. Just doesn’t make any sense to me.”

Keith could only shrug in reply. It didn’t make any sense to him either.

[rueitae]

2018 Fic Roundup

I did this last year and it was nice to do some self reflection and make some goals for 2019. I encourage all my writer friends to do this! No tagging necessary, just tell each other to do it. <3

It’s long, so putting the rest of the fic and reflection questions under the cut.

Stats:

Fics Posted (Gen): 6

Space Birthday (9,595 words): Hunk can feel it in his bones; it’s his birthday. He wants to have a nice one... and does... after accidentally raiding a Galra outpost with Lance and Pidge.

Pilot (4,340): Shiro finds himself in a different reality post s2. Here, the mechs are called Gundams. (Shiro in the Gundam Wing universe/reality)

Code (7,321): Pidge and the others keep fond memories of Earth through oldies musical trivia. It comes in handy on a mission.

Self Insert (6,357): Lance reads a story to his niece and nephew on the eve he leaves for school at the Galaxy Garrison. The kids have Opinions on how it should go.(i totally still need to change their names to the canon ones)

Too Soon and Not Soon Enough (1,796): Keith is 13 and is supposed to go to the Galaxy Garrison next year at Shiro’s encouragement. Until the Galra invade and plans change.

Welcome to the Neighborhood (2,237): Allura gets used to being not dead and that includes meeting her cosmic neighbors.

Fics Posted (Plance): 17

Wrong Diamond (2,384): Gentlemen thief AU. “At midnight, I will steal the heart of Voltron,” the note says. Pidge has a thief to catch.

Diamond in the Rough (8,045): prequel to Wrong Diamond. How they meet!

Road Trip (4,710): Lance and Pidge are back on Earth. Zarkon has the others and the two are on the run from a bureaucratic Galaxy Garrison that doesn’t want the world to know about aliens yet. Oh, and Lotor is with them.

Exsanguination (16,255): Pidge is a vampire hunter captured by Haggar. She finds some unlikely help in the vampire’s similarly undead servant.

Power Up! (3,500): Pidge is on the cusp of finding out where Zarkon is holding her father using less than legal methods. She’s caught in the act by her lab partner (Lance, a superhero in training).

Plance on Ice (2,300): A figure skating AU! Pidge and Lance are former competitive partners having a date free time on the ice

Being Plance (3,900): Pidge and Lance pull a personality switch prank over on the rest of the team. Canon verse.

Keeping Cool (3,098): Mermaid AU! Pidge is in trouble with pirates and gets some unexpected help from the sea.

The Cake (839): Canon verse, Lance gets a cake for his birthday and assumes it’s from Hunk.

Frostbite (6,109): Pidge is a renowned super villain. Lance is a hero in training with something to prove. Lance over uses his powers one day and Pidge has some soul searching to do.

Crystal Clear (5,516): Another superhero AU. Lance is captured by his arch nemesis. They have a heart-to-heart, taunt, and flirt.

The Secrets of Beasts (2,007): AU canon verse. Years down the road, Green keeps Pidge from going on a mission with the others. It takes Kosmo to find out why.

See You Yesterday (8,132): Lance works nervously as a bartender for a 1920s mafia when all he wanted to do was leave the farming life. One night he gets a strange patron who changes his life - and his perspective of the world. Time travel AU

Shot Through the Heart (1,087): post canon AU. Lance and Pidge keep Nadia and Sylvio entertained.

Seasons of Magic (11,744): Pidge is a mage. Lance is her dragon familiar. Series of domestic-ish one shots. Not in sequential order.

Between Rocks and A Hard Place (8,144): Canon verse. Pidge and Lance are trapped due to a caved-in mine, with pirates waiting for them on the other side. And Pidge is hurt.

Cow-parent Trapped (1,099): s8 canon continuation. Pidge visits Lance at the farm and does not expect Kaltenecker to make them talk to each other.

Lotura 1

Birthday Prompt #5 (5,500): Oh gosh I never named it. Fantasy AU in which Lotor is essentially Rapunzel and Allura is Aurora with a better (depending on who you ask) birth-prophesy. Tiny hint of Shallura in this as well.

Collaborations: 3

First Encounters for the (Altean Plance AU): Pidge is an independent noblewoman and Lance is her bodyguard. Writing done with @hushman and @pidge-suggestions

To Sail, To Break, To Earn (Plance - 10,268): Lance is a pirate and Pidge is a mermaid. There’s also a curse involved. With @sp4c3-0ddity

It’s Beginning to Look a lot Like A Christmas Carol (Plance- 14,384): post s8 canon verse with @hailqiqi and @sp4c3-0ddity. Exactly as the title says. Lance is the subject of a ghostly intervention. Crack treated seriously.

Fey AU (Plance): with @vivalachocolate this was @sp4c3-0ddity ‘s prompt to Viva but I was nosy and added a chapter and I’m so glad she wasn’t mad at me for it. 😅

Ship/Character breakdown:

Ship breakdown:

I guess the 17 Plance fics speak for themselves. I did write one Lotura fic as a special birthday prompt because @ritsykitty is such a good friend.

Character breakdown:

I have a gen fic for each Paladin, but then the Plance fics outnumber those, so Lance and Pidge would be my go to.

Characters that had the main focus:

So for character POV, each Paladin has one, then within Plance, Pidge has 12 and Lance has 7. Interesting, I thought it was more even. Hunk had a POV in a Plance fic too briefly!

Specifics:

Best/worst title?

Best title: Urgh I liked a lot of them. Too Soon and Not Soon Enough probably. I like how it summarizes the story without telling you how, but by the end you know.

Worst title: Seasons of Magic aka I tried to come up with a clever title when I realized I wasn’t done with it. It’s so bland to me. I’m also basically trying to rebrand from mage/familiar AU. I don’t think it’s working 😅 (not that I care I’m trying to make it easier to reference but I’m too late)

Best/worst last line?

Best: “I love you too, Pidge,” he [Lance] says, nestling her head to his chest and not bothering to correct her. “You’re the best nemesis a hero could ask for.” - I love that line so much, from Crystal Clear. Enemies to lovers is such a good trope.

Worst: Pidge groans. At this rate her double life is definitely doomed to unravel. - for how much I love Frostbite, I really hate how lame it ends. Like I totally could have said that better or continued the scene a bit but I am LAZY.

General questions:

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?

I wrote waaaaaaay more than expected. I figured I’d write something every few months. Now I can write a 2k fic in a setting if I’m on game.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?

I was just doing gen fic last year, never would I have expected to be so taken by Plance that it became my main muse.

What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

Honestly? Probably Pilot. It was one of my earliest VLD fic ideas to do a Gundam Wing crossover and to actually finish a one shot early in the year (when I was still dipping my feet into fandom again) just made me so so happy. I still smile thinking about the continuation possibilities. One of my favorite parts of Shiro’s character is that he is the ace pilot. Because of Keith’s role that sometimes gets overshadowed. I was so pleased to get to highlight that.

Okay, NOW your most popular story.

On Ao3, that would be Exsanguination. No surprise there, it was my first posted Plance fic and I continued it.

On Tumblr it’s First Encounters, the first of the Altean Plance AU based on the art and headcanons. I was just struck with a clear opening image one afternoon and wrote it all right then and there. I had no idea it would be so well received.

Story most underappreciated by the universe?

Space Birthday. It may have been a bit of a mess since it was my very first VLD fic, but it has everything I love. Hunk bonding with an ‘enemy’ over cooking, Team Punk, Plance in distress, Hunk saves the day thanks to mechanics. Also heartfelt stuff with Keith. And he’s the only Paladin besides Lance to get an actual birthday themed fic from me.

Story that could have been better?

I really hate to say Wrong Diamond, but I totally could have done much better with it. It feels skimpy. Probably why I am still writing in the AU.

Sexiest story?

Ha. That would be a tie between Crystal Clear and Exsanguination. The first I actually tried and the second completely by accident. I’m not sure it worked though.

Saddest story?

All my sad fics have a bit of crack to them. Pilot is pretty melancholy. Crystal Clear has a good Plance argument that gets heated. Road Trip in general though might take the cake. It’s full of angst amid some humor due to the premise.

Most fun?

Shot Through the Heart in terms of tone.

Story with single sweetest moment? Space Birthday

"Uh, Keith, hold up a tic."

Confused, Keith turned back around. "What?"

Hunk rubbed the back of his neck. "So uh, you know we're friends right? Like, I meant what I said we're like brothers. We're tight. I mean, we share a mind inside of a giant robot."

Keith blinked, clearly surprised. "Yeah, I kinda got that from the hug you gave me back then. It was nice," he said with a smile. "And we work well together."

"Yeah so - wait what? No, I'm supposed to be giving you the pep talk here."

"It's fine, Hunk. I'm doing important work and so are you. I already had this talk with Allura."

"Oh. Well, what I'm trying to say is that we're friends. I care a lot about you and your feelings. So if I say something that's weird or you don't like, you gotta tell me. I'm a terrible and nosy person and I'm sorry."

Keith stood silent, processing the words, and then smiling. "I've accepted the side of me that's Galra," he said simply. "It's still a little weird, but I've always had this feeling that something didn't add up." He smiled a bit. "I don't mind a question or two, but I'm still learning myself."

"Deal, no Galra questions for a while then. Just as long as you come visit more often, okay? We all miss you.

"...hug it out?"

Keith snorted and obliged into Hunk's waiting arms. "Always."

Hardest story to write?

I struggled with the ending to Exsanguination. It took forever to come to me.

Easiest/most fun story to write?

I wrote The Secrets of Beasts in one setting and I still can’t believe how easily it came out. I blame the Plance discord folks for putting everyone on a baby craze.

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?

Not particularly? I write based on my existing understanding of the characters and nothing really surprised to that note.

Most overdue story?

Welcome to the Neighborhood. I wanted to write that Allura gen fic all year (as I wanted one for all the Paladins) and I hoped s8 would give me the motivation. It was not worth the cost.

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

Collaborations! And participating in a zine! And signing up for events (exchanges and bangs)! I learned that it’s not that scary. People are chill and so easy to get along with. Also the task isn’t as daunting as I think of it’s an idea I love.

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

This is hard because I’m already doing above and beyond what I ever expected to be doing writing wise. I suppose it will be to finish my gen fic since I’ve been writing a lot of plance lately.

[jo-the-schmo]

Red, Dead, Reflections Ch.1

A/N: Hello everyone! I’m back on my garbage and writing for a new fandom, and I’m not sorry about it! Now, I doubt anyone who followed my previous writing is going to read this, but just in case I’ll give a disclaimer. This IS going to be the same concept from my old series Breaking. As you all know, I hate that story and wish I had done a better job with it, I’m considering this to be my way to do the idea justice. If you are new to my stories, Welcome new potential friend! I will respectfully ask you to not look into Breaking, only because it isn’t good, could possibly spoil the way this fic is gonna work, and is NOT for the RDR fandom in anyway. I’m really excited to be writing this story, and I’m hoping to make it better! I hope you enjoy it! I’m so sorry for this long note, please forgive me!

Word count: 5981

Warnings: Explicit language, blood, death, violence

Summary: After a bank job with your friends goes wrong, the world decides to toss you into an old yet new world. But is this random chance a blessing or a curse? Find out by going through this semi-choose your own adventure and see what consequences you reap. 

A/N pt.2: There won’t be any choices for this chapter because it’s mainly set up, but expect some in the chapters to come! I hope you have a good time! If anyone would like to be tagged, you can message me, comment, or send an ask! Don’t be shy! :D This does not have a set character x reader because guess what? It’s gonna be partially your choice, babes! I hope you can be patient with me until this feature is implemented. 

From Out West

“This is a little too ballsy for my liking, Austin.” You warned as you carefully adjusted the colored contact lenses in your eyes. “Since when did you turn into a little pussy-willow?” He smirked at you while he turned a corner. “This is a bank, not a home robbery, so forgive me if I’m a tad nervous about this! We’re robbing a god damn bank in 2019, in a busy city that we aren’t necessarily familiar with!” “Maybe you aren’t familiar, you know I’m a regular ol’LA boy.” You turned your head to look at the two in the backseat. “Miguel, you can’t seriously be okay with this.” You questioned but were confident in it enough to make it a statement. He shrugged his shoulders, making that confidence literally evaporate. “We gotta trust Austin, as crazy as this plan is. We haven’t gotten caught yet.” You crossed you arms and made sure your wig was pinned right. “Doesn’t mean we won’t be startin’ now.” You grumbled. “Come on, sissy! This plan is fool-proof! They’ll never even know it was us!” Eli chirped. “Oh yeah, except for the fact that this is a fucking bank and the FBI can get on our asses for this!” You swore it was exhausting being the only realistic one sometimes. “On top of that, there’s only 5 of us! We’re insane!” “6.” Austin corrected. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Your girlfriend won’t be in the damn room with us.” “She’s the ace up our sleeves, it would be silly for her to be in there with us.” The car smelled like old cigarettes, it made you sick. The band around your chest dug into your ribs. You opted to stay silent and relent for the time being, instead focusing on your disguise. The wig was carefully pinned to your real hair, it was short enough to be confused for a men’s haircut but had enough length to not require any glue. Dark brown hair, abnormally vibrant green eyes. And with the mask covering your face, that would be their only descriptions they could give to the police. Flat chest, boyish haircut, baggy black hoodie, just your average deviant. The destination was in view. “Alright,” Austin started. “everyone knows the plan, yeah? Gina is inside, she’ll send us the signal. We go in quick and make our presence known. I go behind the counter to make sure the tellers ain’t up to no funny shit. Miguel, you round up the lovely citizens into a corner, hit Gina a little to make it convincing. Eli, you take care of the money. And Y/N, I need you to stay in character, be loud and intimidating, keep the tellers in check when I’m helpin’ Eli, and the civils with Miguel, got it?” You all nodded. He looked back at Miguel. “You got the fake bomb ready?” “Yes’ir.” “I’ll pass the big boss to you once I pick him out. Zoe is waiting for us in the alleyway between the bank and the office building. We get in, make some noise, scare them shitless, get the money, and go.” He parked up front of the white walls, you saw a mother walk through the glass doors with her toddler in a stroller. You immediately felt bad. “You promise this is the last job, right?” You looked at him seriously. “At least the last of something this big, I don’t think I could handle with again.” “Of course! This is just to get us enough money to get us all out. The economy is garbage, think of it as taking what should already be ours.” You heard the crackle of the walkie on Austin’s lap. He threw it into his bag. “That’s the signal, masks on everyone.” Austin’s was a fox, long, fake salt and pepper hair rolled form under his hood. Eli’s was a raccoon, convincing copper bangs swooped between the ears. Miguel had an owl; disturbing blue eyes pierced your being. You strapped on your black dove and joined with group as they exited the stolen vehicle. You kept both your hands in the front pocket of your hoodie, trying to be discrete about the two handguns inside. Only one was loaded with real bullets, that was the backup, You preferred to use the blanks. Unable to trace, and when used properly, won’t hurt anyone. Austin and Eli took the leads. The doors were kicked in. “EVERYONE GET ON THE FUCKING GROUND RIGHT NOW! HANDS UP, ALL YOU! THIS IS A ROBBERY!” He screamed, pointing his gun at a man behind the counter about 3 yards away. Miguel was quick to shout at the people in line to get into the corner of the room. Gina pretended to try and defy, he slaps her, needless to say it’s convincing. “Dove, handle the worms.” You traded spots as Austin grabbed one of the men behind the counter. Your eyes locked with the poor woman, she was covering the stroller with her torso. You pointed your blank gun at some random person. “Stay on the ground or I’ll fucking shoot, ya hear me?” You lowered your voice, made it coarser, time to be a ‘man’. They nodded hysterically. The woman was crying. You could hear Eli screaming his demands in a fake accent. “Everyone hand over your phones. If any of you give me a reason to even SUSPECT you’re up to anything, I will shoot.” Everyone put their phones on the ground and slid them over toward you. You turned your attention to the back. “What’s the hold up, owl?” “I’m handling it.” He strapped the fake bomb to the teller’s chest, making him kneel down in the middle of the bank. “Listen up, everyone! This man has a bomb attached to his body. We have someone hacked into the security cameras. If you don’t follow our instructions to the T, they will blow a hole in this lot.” He paused to let the cries and gasps die out. “Now, for those said instructions, listen close. We will exit the building soon, you will stay down for 5 minutes.” He pointed at a clock on the wall. “Do not touch anything or move a muscle. When 5 minutes have passed, the big guy here-“ He patted the man’s shoulders and dropped a key wrapped in tissue in his lap. “will take a little drive off the premises. He will keep going until he reaches the designated location written on that tissue. If any of you contact the police before the end of the day, he will die, along with any other drivers in his vicinity. So, unless you want a substantial amount of blood on your hands, I’d suggest you keep quiet until midnight. As for the rest of you, you have permission to leave the building once that 5 minutes are up. But I would suggest keeping a low profile, for your safety and others’.” There was a loud crack. “I got it!” The phony Australian accent rang. Austin led the rest of the bank tellers to you, making them sit in the flood of civils. “Staying alert, Dove?” “Don’t patronize me, stupid Fox.” This whole situation pissed you off. The baby was crying, mom was too, trying to hush the whines. “Fire a shot, Dove!” What? “Don’t let their insubordination stand.” He demanded. This was a fear tactic. He was trying to teach a lesson to the others. “I’m not firing a warning shot over a fucking baby, you psycho!” Your blood was boiling, this was overkill, he was way out of line with this. Of course, he wasn’t telling you to shoot the baby or the mother, but you weren’t going to cause more grief where it didn’t need to be. “Take the shot!” “Fuck you!” “Why are you going against me?” Was he seriously doing this now? You felt like your head was going to explode. She was the only person with a child present. You put both of your pieces back in your hoodie and knelt next to her. She flinched as you approached, but that was to be expected. “Ma’am, I’m making an exception for you because you have a child with you, and that prick is really getting on my last nerve. You’re allowed to exit the building now, but the other rules still apply. People will die if you talk, maybe not you, but other people who have children like you do, most certainly. Take your kid and get out, don’t do anything out of the ordinary, and get out.” Her red eyes shook you to your core, familiarity. She nodded in both fear and appreciation. “Than-than-thank y-“ She was choking on her own misfortune, you decided to spare her. “Yeah, yeah, just get out.” She got up and collected herself, checking around the room as she walked out of the building. You could only see his eyes, but you could tell Austin was reaching his limit fast. An older gentleman stared at you. “At least one of you has a heart.” You were glad Austin was too focused on being pissed to hear that. You got up, kicking the phones toward the door as you walked. Austin grabbed you arm. “You’re lucky I didn’t kill her for that.” By letting that woman go, you showed weakness. It was a hint at your identities, but you didn’t care. “And you’re lucky I’m not shooting you for saying that. I’m not a killer like you, Fox.” Your voice was laced with venom. Eli had interrupted your dispute. “Alright lovebirds, time to play nice, we’ve got precious cargo.” He gave both of you a duffle bag, they were pretty hefty. Austin took a deep breath, putting on his best showman voice. “Alright folks! That right there is our cue to hit the road. Remember, 5 minutes on the clock. No one likes a-“ The doors were filled with red and blue, sirens. The police were here. “Shit!” Shit was right. “How the hell are they here?” Austin screamed. He gave you a shove. “It’s probably because of that god damn woman!” “There’s no way she would’ve had enough time for that.” “And no one had a phone out, I was watching the whole time.” Miguel chimed. “We have bigger fish to fry right now! We gotta go.” You all dashed over to the back door, all you had to do was move towards the alley, if you could just get to the dump van, everything would be fine. Drive up to get the real car, leave that one with no prints or hair, and you’d be home free. The 4 of you booked it out the door. But the van was no where to be seen, instead, there were about 3 cops on either side which was 6 in total, trapping you in. “They must’ve got Zoe!” Yeah, no shit. “Put your hands up!” You all raised your arms, except of course for Austin. You kicked his calf. He didn’t budge. “I said put your god damn hands up!” “In case you didn’t notice, pal, there’s a bomb in that building. If you don’t let us pass, I’ll blow that building out of existence, along with the man attached to it.” He pointed his gun to one of the cops to your left. “So, I suggest you let us through, or else you’re gonna piss me off more than I already am.” “We know the bomb is fake, drop to your knees or we will shoot!” Another one barked. Someone had ratted you out. You looked at Miguel and Eli, you weren’t letting this go down, not by a long shot. You tuned out Austin’s ramblings and whispered to the other two. “Be ready to run. I’m gonna buy you guys some time. Don’t kill any of them, disarm them.” “What the hell are you talking about, Y/N?” Miguel questioned with panic. You took a deep breath. “Thank you for being my family.” You swept your leg behind Austin’s knees, and he collapsed to the ground as you stood. The world slowed to a crawl, pulling a gun out of your pocket, these were real bullets. You’ve never missed a target. You drew the attention of all 6 police officers, but no amount of training could prepare them. You fired 3 shots, each one hitting the hands of the officers Austin had been talking to. Their weapons fell from their hands. You felt bodies push past your legs, down the alley way away from the bank. You were glad the streets of LA were confusing. Now was the time. You whipped your body around to face the rest of the officers, firing rapidly at their shins. You weren’t gonna put blood on your hands. But deep down you knew, there was no making out of this one. You would buy them a few minutes while trying to subdue you. Just as your haphazard shots began, they fired precise ones of their own. Two passed through your skull, three in your chest, and one got a through almost half of your jugular. Both pieces fell away from you as gravity swaddled you. Bits of your wooden mask, blood, head pushing back unnaturally, seeing the backs of your made family run, they were almost home free. There was no pain after that point, you waited patiently for your back to hit the ground beneath you, but it never did. You kept falling. And falling. The midday light felt like it was slipping away, there were leather walls encompassing your lifeless form. No sound, no sense of texture, just the smell of dirt and decay. Then there was nothing but darkness, but that void that beckoned you, that pulled at your very being, was gone just as quick as it appeared.

Your body shot forward with a violent intake for air. The gasps filled your lungs to the brim, your chest and head ached, throat tight. The coughing erupted from deep in your chest, which also held a different pain from the ever-tightening band around it. You threw you hoodie away and made quick work of loosening it just a bit, and in doing so noticed that your body was free of any physical wounds. There was still a soreness, and blood wiped off your skin, but there were no open wounds. You were incredibly cold, and at first you assumed that to be attributed to your near-death experience, until you looked up high to see to see an open window with snow falling outside. “I don’t think we’re in California anymore.” You muttered to yourself. You shivered, the place was covered in hay and in low light, that’s when the smell hit you. It reeked of animals, that would probably have something to do with the fact that you’re in a barn. Shakily, you got to your feet. Knees wobbling, your eyes adjusted, there were horses. That certainly explained the stench. A chill ran up your spine, the cold tickling at your vertebrae. You scanned the room for where you had tossed your hoodie, only to find it in a horse’s mouth. Your eyes widened in fear. “No, no, no, no, no, no!” You exclaimed. You rushed forward and grasped at the hanging sleeve, tugging on it with all your strength. “Drop it! Drop it right now!” The horse did not listen, in fact, now it seemed more hellbent on consuming the thick material. After hurtling a few curses at the horse, you heard a distinct rip. You fell back, the remnants of black cloth now in tatters. You let out a muffled scream of frustration. Even with the long sleeves of your cotton shirt, you were still freezing. It suddenly struck you how odd it is for it to be snowing at all. You figured you weren’t in California anymore, but you were somewhere that snows in the middle of May? How far were you? You couldn’t think of any states that snowed this late in the year. Were you in Maine? Up north, Canada? How did you even get here? “Did those idiots come back to get me? I could’ve sworn…” You could’ve sworn they ran like you told them to, and that you had experienced several fatal injuries. Is this hell? Purgatory? The other side? It was cold enough to be Hell that’s for sure. Nothing made sense. You found your mask on the ground, chunks of the painted wood were replaced with vacant space, splintered bullet holes. You fastened it to the first belt loop, it rested against your left pant leg. Pins dug into your scalp, wigs still surprisingly attached to your head. Your eyes watered, your contacts were drying out. You opted take them out now rather than waste your time trying to find drops in a barn. You flicked them away once they were out. “Now, if there’s a barn with animals, there’s gotta be a house with people.” You walked over to the large wooden doors as your talked to yourself, but today just had to be the worst day of your life. Something landed on top of you, or more accurately someone. You were surprised you didn’t feel any cracks as the weight crashed on you. Shifting your weight over, you elbowed the man in the jaw. He rolled off of you with a grunt of pain. You were quick to jab him in the stomach with the toe of your boot. Sputtering a cough with saliva dripping out the mouth, the man rushed to stand. He was trying to fight. “You’re on the wrong side of the mountains, partn’r.” He slurred. “This here is O’Driscoll territory, Which you don’t got no business bein’ in.” I’m in the mountains? Where the hell- He didn’t give you enough time to finish that thought before he was throwing a punch at you. If this basic boy thinks he can step in my personal space, he’s got another thing coming. You blocked the fist with your forearm and redirected the force toward the ground. With the base of your wrist, you hit his throat. The force of your own strength and the ever so impeccable sense of gravity caused him to wheeze, choke, and writhe on the ground. “Listen here, buddy,” you pressed your boot down on his chest “I have no idea where the hell I am right now. I don’t give a single shit about territory or whatever the fuck you’re going on about, but if you put your hands on me again, I’m gonna mangle your entire lower half with a rake.” You applied more weight. “I didn’t come here of my own volition, someone put me here. Which means, you’re little punk ass better tell me what’s going on or get out of my way so I can-“ Gunshots. Mystery man took your distraction as an opportunity to wriggle out form under you. They were ceaseless, did someone drop you off in the middle of a gang war, what the hell is going on? You were about to duck behind whatever cover was around you if the idiot of the room had decided he didn’t learn his lesson. “Are you with those crazies?” He yelled, peeking out the barn doors for only a second. “I should’ve known.” His voice was cold and malicious. “You’re with that son of a bitch, Dutch!” “Who?” “Don’t play dumb with me, pretty boy, they must’ve sent you up to spy on us! I’m gonna kill you for-“ “I literally have no idea what’s going on!” But he wasn’t listening to reason, clocked you in the ribs before you got the chance to block, then using your surprise to his advantage, hit you on the nose. There was a familiar crack and blood rush. “Did you just fucking break my nose, you ass?” You screeched toward the ground, wiping away the blood. You took him off guard by doing that, so you were quick to knock him in the jaw. The shooting stopped but you were a little preoccupied and decided not to waste anymore time. His arm bent to caress the side of his face. You rushed forward, lacing your arm between the gap his made. Using all your weight, you swung your legs out and forced him to drop to the ground. His back slammed forcefully and with a swift adjustment, your shins trapped his neck, locking him in place. You squeezed his neck enough to make him gasp. He tried to push away from you, but with the position you left him in, there’s no way he’d be able to without some sort of outside assistance. “Who are you calling pretty boy now? Huh? Who, bitch boy?” You heard the door start to open, you let lose and pulled the man up to shield you, locking his head so that you peek between a gap in your arm and his head. A man wearing a blue coat and hat walked in, his hands resting on his belt. “Well, well, what have we got ourselves here?” You couldn’t quite place his accent. You noticed he had a holster. “Don’t fuck with me, dude. I’ve got your friend trapped between me and you. No need to make this get crazy.” You warned, tightening your grip to enunciate your point. What sounded almost like a chuckle escaped his throat. “You must not be an O’Driscoll if you think he’s my friend.” You panicked, you tried to think of your next move, but he had plans of his own. “What’s your name, son?” Your suspicions were correct, it seems. This isn’t the first time someone’s confused you for a man, especially when you were trying so hard to not look like yourself. But maybe, you could use this to your advantage. “James West.” That was Austin’s code name for danger. If someone introduced you or called any of you James, it meant they weren’t trust worthy. You and Gina would usually use Jamie, but now James felt like the safer option. “Now how in the hell did you get involved in this, West?” He rested his hip against one of the stable posts.   “I have no idea.” You threw the man away from you, there was no point holding him anymore. “I woke up here, and this guy just started attacking me.” You thought for a moment. “Are you Dutch?” You asked. This time, it was a single, hearty- “HA!” He had a spark in his eye. “Me? Dutch? I ain’t that old yet, kid.” You rolled your eyes and pulled yourself up. “Well, my nose is broken because this little shit thought I was with you, so I have some choice words for this ‘Dutch’.” You huffed. “And don’t call me ‘kid’.” You brushed your fingers across the bridge of your nose, preparing yourself for what you were about to do. One deep breath in, out, pop. You pushed your nose back into place and winced. A wad of blood shot out. “Jesus shit!” You coughed, you never get used to having to do that. The blue coat cowboy looking mother-fucker looked semi-impressed. “Well, I’m not Dutch, but you could sure meet him if it pleases.” Something caught his attention. “Speak of the devil…” The door opened again. A man walked in with very distinct black hair. He was also a cowboy looking mother-fucker. Oh god, am I in yeeyee country? His eyes immediately locked on you. “Did you cause this mess, Arthur? Or have we just met a new friend?” The man who you presumed to be Dutch, had a deeper voice than the man apparently called Arthur, but their accents were similar. That was not promising for you. “That depends, his name is West, James West. I walked in a right fine mess between him and that there O’Driscoll.” Arthur pointed to the man still struggling to steady himself. Dutch choked a deep laugh, he seemed more amused than Arthur was. “Right fine is right, Arthur. You did this?” He asked. You nodded reluctantly. “You’re a good fighter, boy. Real good, it seems.” He strode over to the guy on the floor and picked him up by the collar, tossing him over to Arthur. “Morgan, you deal with this trash while I talk to our new pal.” Dutch walked over to you, confidence in his step, while Arthur threw the man back on the ground. He wrapped an arm around your shoulder and shook you around a bit. “James West, huh?” “Yeah, what’s it to ya?” “Oh, this boy’s got spunk, Morgan!” You looked over and saw Arthur yanking the man around by the shirt. Dutch forced your attention back to him. “Now West, you’ve gotta understand our position here. We can tell clear as day you ain’t involved in a lick of this mess. But we don’t have a single clue as to what your business is up here. Now, you seem like a considerate young man, but I got worried folks on this mountain, and I can’t have no scamps running around and hellraising” He squeezed your shoulder. “So, don’t take any offense to what I’m about to ask, but what are you doing up here?” He looked you dead in the eyes. In your opinion, the question was fair. You couldn’t fully let your guard down, but they appeared to not be whoever put you here. Then again, these O’Driscoll’s didn’t seem to be either. “I can’t give you an answer to that one, Mr. …?” “Van Der Linde.” That’s one hell of a name. “Mr. Van Der Linde. Frankly, I have no damn clue why I’m here. One minute, I’m getting shot down in the middle of the day, and then I wake up trapped in some barn in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, in what looks like the ass end of winter. So, I’m a little confused right now to say the least.” You were clearly frustrated with your situation, he wasn’t oblivious to it. “Where are you from, son?” “California.” That was a safe enough answer. “James West from out West. That’s certainly an opener.” He scratched his chin. “I’m gonna put you to a test young man.” He turned you around and lead you over to where Arthur had just gotten off the now bloody man. He was whimpering, begging under his breath for mercy. “I don’t think he’s got much to say, Dutch. They apparently happened upon this place and took it over. That’s all I’m getting’” “I’m going to give our new young friend a choice.” He pulled a revolver out of his holster and held the handle out to you. “In normal circumstances, I’d let Arthur handle this situation himself. But I’ve got an itching curiosity with you, kid.” You felt obligated to hold it in your hand. Looking down at the man, pity flared in your chest. “Should we kill him, or let him go? I’m letting you make the call.” What kind of question was this? Who were these guys? The choice wasn’t very difficult, you’d be a hypocrite if you did otherwise, and you weren’t compromising your promise on the off chance these guys might not like your opinion. You handed the gun back to Dutch. “Just because he’s an asshole, doesn’t mean he deserves to die. Let him go.” Dutch was intrigued by your answer. He looked over to Arthur with a smirk. “I think I like kid!” “Please don’t call me ‘kid.” You requested. Arthur pulled the man to his feet and threw him outside. “Get outta here before he regrets it.” The man darted into the snow, leaving a trail behind him. “Grab the horse, Arthur. We gotta get something out of this.”  You were lead outside to find a horrific scene, bodies were strewn about the snowy landscape. Whoever these guys were, they were not to be trifled with. You should play this safe. There was a house not too far away, the snow was dense. It was more than freezing. You sent a glare to the horse Arthur led past you. You’ll pay for this, you dumb fucking horse. With your adrenaline dying down, your whole being felt frozen. “Normally, I wouldn’t be one for disrupting dead for anything other than money, but you’ll die out here without something warm, Mr. West.” Dutch gestured to one of the several bodies riddled through the snow. You swallowed the lump in your throat, trying your best not to think about how you were robbing from dead people. It wouldn’t be the first time, but you still didn’t feel good about it. You separated from him and carefully stepped around the bodies littered in the snow. You found a man with his face in the snow, you pretty much picked him so you wouldn’t have to see his face as you stripped him of his coat. It didn’t look particularly warm initially, but anything would be better than this. The arms bent limply back as you peeled the sleeves away. Luckily upon further inspection, you were happy to learn there was a sort of wool lining inside, that would at least help insulate your own body heat. A sudden commotion broke out from inside the rustic home. A man yelling for Dutch and a woman screaming. Your instincts made you spring into action, you leapt through large portions of the snow to make it to the steps faster and before you knew it you were bursting through the door. A blonde man wearing another cowboy-looking hat was chasing a woman around a table. “What the hell are you doing, Micah?” Arthur questioned as him and Dutch followed you in. “We got a feisty one over here, boys!” He hollered. Oh, you were not comfortable with this type of language. “Stop chasing the poor woman, ya moron!” He warned with more intensity. You weren’t gonna see this go down, that’s for sure. You ran up behind the man called Micah, grabbed his collar, and used his weight to pull his back towards you, and then to the ground. His body slammed, he let out a surprised yelp, followed by a pained groan. “Fucking sicko! Stop chasing her around, she’s scared!” “Get out of my house!” The woman bellowed. Admittedly, you had no idea what was going on, but you knew you could at least try and defuse the situation. You put your hands up to appear less threatening. “Miss, I don’t know who you are or what in God’s name is going on, but I promise I am not here to hurt you.” You spoke to her in a calm voice. Whatever was going on, it clearly had her frazzled. “I don’t have any weapons, and I don’t make it habit of hurting people who don’t need hurting. You clearly have been hurting for no reason. Can you explain to me what’s happened so that I can help you with this situation?” You took a cautious step around the table to make sure she wouldn’t dart away from you, you kept steady eye contact. “They…they killed my husband a few days ago! They took over my home and locked me in the basement!” She wept. Maybe these O’Driscolls were the ones to stow you in the barn, they sure seemed like the type with this new information. “I’m so sorry for your loss, ma’am. I can assure you that those men won’t be bothering you anytime soon. Can you-“ You heard glass shatter, looking over, you found Micah scattering to his feet, fire was spreading from the floor to the wall at an incredible rate. It was already crawling up the right-side wall before you had a chance to react. There was no way you could put that out by yourself, and the others weren’t exactly jumping at the chance to help you. You settled on running to grab some blankets from the bed across the room. The boys were leading the woman out of the house and she reluctantly followed. Micah sent you a glare as you passed him out of the house. “Oh, don’t you look at me like that, you weren’t any help!” You knew you should keep your mouth shut, but you knew you were right on this one. The group was walking toward some horses, you followed behind. “Micah, lead the horse back to camp.” You handed the blankets to the woman. “Thank you.” She seemed genuine but was also hurt by your sentiments. “It’s no problem, ma’am.” “Adler, Sadie Adler is my name.” She wrapped herself in the blankets. “Well, it’s no problem, Mrs. Adler. It’s the bare minimum to what I could’ve done.” You hoped whatever camp Dutch mentioned was close by. This cold was blistering. “Mrs. Adler, you may ride with me, we’ll get you back to people who can help.” Dutch hopped up onto a white horse, lending a hand for Sadie to pull herself up. “Arthur, please take our new friend with you. I don’t think he’s in any shape to be riding.” Arthur nodded, heaving himself with ease onto a spotted mare? You couldn’t tell if it was a girl, but you just got that vibe. He did not give you a hand. Oh yeah, I’m a dude. A manly man. You gripped the back of the saddle and used all the arm strength you had to get onto the bare back on the horse. You hoped this ride wasn’t going to be too bumpy because you were not about to get punched because you had to grab onto this man and couldn’t tell if someone was a homophobe or not. You sure hoped these people weren’t, but you weren’t exactly in the position to be picky. “Pearson’s not gonna happy about this.” Arthur mentioned as the horses pushed forward. “Mr. Pearson isn’t happy about anything except his drink. He’ll be alright.” Now seemed like a good a time as any to start asking questions. They couldn’t go anywhere away from you at the moment. “Not to interrupt or anything, but could someone tell me where I am, or what day it is. Could someone please tell me what the deal is?” “We’re north of New Hanover if the maps are correct. We’re planning to head down there as soon as this winter passes. God knows how long that’s gonna take.” Dutch complained. You had never heard of New Hanover, but apparently it was winter. Maybe you really did get shot, put into a hospital maybe? Then these guys… You panicked for a second. O’Driscoll wasn’t another name for them was it? It didn’t make much sense but no one else would put this much effort into stealing you away. “As for the day, I couldn’t tell ya exactly. It’s winter in the year of our Lord 1899.” He laughed. What? “What?” “Ah, just bit of a joke, son. We live in dark times. We’re hurtling straight into a new century.” Wait was he joking or not joking? “It’s 1899?” You tried to keep your voice neutral, but he seemed to pick up on your worry. “Yes, it is, son.” He paused. “Are you alright?” You were anything but alright. These people are crazy, I’m trapped on a mountain with some insane cultists who think they’re in the 19th century, I’m fucked. “Arthur, we need to hurry, the boy’s looking pale.” Your head felt fuzzy, colors were blurring together. I am not stuck on a god damn mountain in 1899, I’m not, that’s physically impossible. This is all a dream, or some weird set up. You felt like you were 19 again, disconnected, afraid, losing it. You weren’t gonna go back there again, you wouldn’t! You didn’t know you had stopped breathing. You didn’t feel Arthur’s arm catching you so you wouldn’t get trampled.

 Everything was black.

[pastelbatfandoms]

H.R. Wells and Renee West Tarot Readings

Character Tarot readings for My Fic ‘Wells of Hearts

Possibilities Spread

..................8.............

..................7.............

.....6-C1.............6-C1...

4-C1...5-C1.....5-C2...4-C2

...................3....................

.....1-C1.............1-C2...

This spread is a double spread. It is where each will take you next in your book. Each side will be for the character you designate it for. Myself, I would use the left for the female and the right for the male.

Oracle Card- Earth School (Life Lessons,Soul Growth,Higher Learning)

1-C1. Significator Card for Character One (C1)- Six of Swords & The World  

(These two together  represent a moving on of turmoil and letting others help her,finally feeling comfortable in her own skin and like she has a place,meeting HR and establishing a long lasting and happy relationship with him.)

1-C2. Significator Card for Character Two (C2)- Two of Pentacles & Eight of Cups 

( The Two of Pentacles may represent a fledgling business that is struggling to get off the ground or stay afloat.-His Business with his partner Randol-the card also represents writers as well and HR has written a few books. The eight of cups represent him moving on from his Earth and fledgling business to something new and possibly better,trying to let go of bad financial descions and doing a little soul searching.)

3. Situation: This card will reveal the situation they are about to face.- 5 of swords R & 6 of cups 

(Eobard is definitely that past lover trying to wedge himself between Renee and HR and old wounds and memories are resurfacing. However 6 of cups could mean that Renee is comparing HR to Harry and Harry does show up again later on when her and HR are together. However Renee still feels secure,safe and cared for with HR.)

4. Character's outer response to situation. This is how they seem to feel about it.- Renee- The Empress with Eight of Pentacles & HR- 5 of Cups R and 4 of Wands 

(A lot of feminine energy with The Empress unlike The High Priestess that femininity is not just sexual but committed and loving as well. Despite everything Renee still feels loyal and trusting towards HR but must balance work with her relationship. Shouldn’t be that hard since they DO work together...

HR is still trying to let go of the past or what he did on his earth,the not really being a scientist,opening up to others will help and he needs to let go of feeling sorry for himself and be more intune with his creative side again. But once he does he will find not just supportive co workers and friends but a deep committed relationship as well,that scene when Savitar asks him “Still trying to find your place?” and HR answers with “I have found My place,it’s here,with these people.” comes to mind.)

5. Character's inner response to situation. This is how they feel about it or how it makes them feel. -Renee- 9 of Cups with 2 of Pentacles R  & HR- 4 of Pentacles with 5 of Wands R

 (Renee feels accomplished and self confidence like she can do anything atm but needs to make sure there is still a balance between work (As a hero and scientist) and relationships/play. (Her family,friends & HR)  

With HR I feel like his inner response may be about the relationship ( Self Sufficient, do not need the outside world to be happy,maybe more private)  or about him personally he may not have to worry financially anymore but that might make him more stingy,he might be more inclined to start his own business and do things his own way but might want to keep it more private and will be guarded and constantly on the look out for those trying to take away his happiness (be it work or new found family) reminding me of when he was on the run from Gypsy after breaking the Earth 19 time travel ban, H.R. also tends to hide his pain with humor or just ignore it completely but his walls come down around Renee,and Cisco,and he does not need prove himself anymore. Even though he still does.) 

6. Character's response to the other character's outer response. How does his reaction affect her? How does hers affect him? HR's Reaction- 10 of Wands with The Hermit. Renee's reaction- 9 of Wands with 3 of Swords R

(This sentence is very HR- Born with an inherent interest for adventure, novelty and travel he covered as much ground as he could and had a go at anything that caught his attention and imagination.- But so does this, especially once Reverse Flash takes Renee-  After the events of the Nine of Wands, the Man has almost gone into automatic pilot mode and can’t stop now even if he wanted to.  If we could see his face, it is for sure his teeth are gritted and his jaw set hard. It looks like it is all up to him.  It seems he is trying to push his way forward or through something and is experiencing resistance.  There may be blocks or obstacles he has to overcome before he is free to travel onwards.   HR may be a little confused as to how he managed to arrive at this stage and is aware that he may have made mistakes along the way. He may have chosen the wrong path here and there, got involved with the wrong people and said the wrong things. He also acknowledges that at times he got things right and when that happened life flowed pleasantly and easily. The Hermit is aware that he must now apply the knowledge and experiences to what he plans to do, his next move, and where he wants to go in life now. He knows that he cannot change the  past, but he can learn from the past. (Did Cisco not say almost the same thing to him?) 

Instead of always having to have company and people around him to make himself feel better HR needs to reflect on his own so he can mature and grow. 

Renee-  When referring to relationships The Nine of Wands would indicate that you are very wary of relationships and may indeed have been hurt in the past and possibly several times. Perhaps you have been looking for love in all the wrong places. It might be time to start afresh. Also to not be so negative and hyper sensitive, Accepting pain of the past and moving on. 

7. Where does this move the plot?- Page of Wands R with Wheel of Fortune R (These two are very Reverse Flash) 

8. Situation: This card will reveal the situation they are about to face. (if you want to use this to plot the book out, you simply repeat the layout.)"- 3 of Cups with King of Cups R 

(LOTS of wedding cards!  It can suggest a third person in a relationship and when upright this third person is welcome.-Harry! They do end up having a Poly relationship in a way-  moving from a period of drought in your love-life to having several potential partners to choose from all at the one time. If there has been a separation or falling out between partners the Three of Cups can symbolize a happy re-union. BUT with the king of Cups R ,could indicate things with Thawne are not over...  At worst, the reversed King of Cups can represent someone who is vindictive and has a talent for being able to punish others through emotional manipulation.  If this sounds like someone you have met in the past, you still have work to do in releasing yourself from his controlling forces.  “You belong to ME...” 

Oracle Card- Earth Pulsing (Slow down, connect with nature) 

Relationship Spread

********7***********8********

****1***2***3***4***5***6****

********9***********10*******

********11**********12*******

********13****15****14*******

1) What you are bringing into the relationship- Renee- 8 of Pentacles R (Seems more like HR when he lived on his Earth before he met Team Flash)

2) Where you are now, in relation to the other person- Ace of Cups (New beginnings, A budding relationship, Deep commitment) 

3) What you are hoping to get from the relationship- 8 of swords. So in other words she wants the opposite of this Gif >  

4) What the other person is bringing into their relationship with you- HR-8 of cups (Fulfilment, an Escape, a chance for them both to walk away from their emotional baggage and help one another.) 

5) What they are getting out of it- 10 of swords (letting go,dealing with his demons,change for the better,also I don’t think it relevant here,but the ten of swords is also a death card and HR does die... :(

6) What they are hoping to achieve/experience with you- 9 of pentacles (Abundance ,prosperity, independence, comfort and material wealth.)  

7) How you see the other person- 2 of swords.  It refers to someone who is harmonious and peaceful when it comes to dealing with different relationships and situations. However, they will have difficulty thinking if anything goes out of control. They tend to compromise a lot to avoid any conflict or argument.- If that isn’t HR!

8) How they see you- 3 of pentacles.  It represents someone who is an expert at work with a problem-solving bent of mind. Such people not only have excellent communication skills and practical experience but also work well as a team. They think in advance, surprising others with their innovations.- Yep sounds like Renee! Also sounds like Harry lol

9) How you saw him/her when you first met- Knight of cups.  He is a reformed and artistic person with a plethora of innovative ideas to offer. Since the knight is a youthful personality, he requires constant mental stimulation to avoid boredom. At the same time, he is friendly, intelligent, and highly-principled ready to communicate his feelings without hesitation. Passionate and Zealous.- I mean yeah that’s HR alright. 

10) How the other person saw you on your first meeting- King of pentacles. Honest,caring,supportive,intelligent and family oriented. 

11) Your own anxieties/unconscious fears- 9 of cups (To not have all her inner and outer happiness and all that she has worked for to fade away. For it to last.) 

12) The other person's anxieties/unconscious fears- 3 of swords (Their past coming back to haunt them,being seen as someone they’re not, A love triangle...) 

13) External influences upon you- Death R ( On the other hand, a relationship once thought dead and gone may be re-ignited.- Harry or Thawne.-  Something or someone you thought dead and gone in your past may have resurfaced, making you fearful and uneasy as your past comes back to haunt you--So Thawne. 

14) External influences upon the other person- Queen of pentacles R ( I’m thinking this represents how HR views Renee once she turns into Obsidian Storm and joins Legion of Doom. This change does not make him angry or slighted but rather sad and no longer caring about his own well being or taking care of anything.) 

15) Where the relationship will go- 9 of swords with King of swords R (Over thinking,depression, mentally exhausted but the situation maybe not as bad as it seems,solutions can be found as it is being manipulated from an outside source,although intelligent this person can be bested if you rely on your own quiet power and not be so indecisive.) 

[mild-lunacy]

Why I Like Labels

So I'm reading this LGBT romance, Bromosexual by Daryl Banner. I always enjoy tongue-in-cheek titles, and tongue-in-cheek books. It's pretty good so far. One of the guys is gay; the other thinks he's straight, but isn't. They're at the point where they're having a sincere conversation about the not-so-straight guy's sexuality, 'cause it's obvious he's definitely sexually attracted to his friend, Ryan. And he's worried he's homophobic, 'cause he still doesn't think he's gay or bi, even after having sex with his male best friend. He honestly says he never related to the gay guys he'd known, but on the other hand, neither is he like the super sex-obsessed straight guys he knows, particularly 'cause he knows a lot of athletes and jocks. He's enjoyed straight sex, but hasn't had a serious relationship. He's like a perfect example of the romance novel and/or slash fic 'gay for you' stereotype.

They go a little further than some books like that, 'cause he says he used to actually think he was asexual (but I suppose he dismissed it 'cause he feels sexual interest sometimes). And although at first, Ryan had insisted that his friend Stefan was gay (or alternatively, bisexual), at that point he agrees with Stefan that maybe he doesn't need a label after all. Things aren't always black and white, are they? Why force it, right?

I don't know if they arrive at the idea of demisexuality eventually or if Stefan ends up identifying as gay in the end, which I know some demi and/or ace people do in real life. So Stefan may end up changing his mind in the future, theoretically, no matter where the story itself ends up. It's only been a few days at this point. Most people need way, way more time. This conversation is pretty early, all things considered. But given that it's called 'Bromosexual', I'm guessing the book doesn't choose to classify Stefan's 'grey' orientation by calling it grey-ace or demisexual. I don't even know if I'd be disappointed, 'cause even having an honest conversation is more than many books end up doing. It's unlikely that an average guy (of any persuasion) would have those kind of soul-searching talks with his friend *or* boyfriend, realistically. Although, well, Ryan is a school psychologist, so he should be more likely to initiate and/or sustain one than most.

All this *did* make me realize that there are actually many portrayals of male demisexuality out there, 'cause the gay-for-you trope is so very, very common. There's really no other way to look at it, at least for me: being sexually attracted only to the person you're super close to is what demisexuality literally means. Since almost all the stories with the gay-for-you trope have the main characters be way closer to one friend than any others, you can't really dispute it. Stefan may not be attracted to any other guys, but he's also not super close to any other guys. And then there's the fact that the only guy he maybe sort of also got attracted to, he was friends with. And nice as it is to talk about how not everything needs a label, basically I think that if you call gay people gay, there's no reason not to continue calling other things by name, too. Either everything has and needs a name, or nothing does. I'm not sure why I should really think that as soon as something becomes complex and difficult to figure out, the need for names and categories disappears. Surely it's *more* important to understand and name difficult things, rather than only the simple, black and white things. Honestly, if anything didn't need categorizing, surely it's the obvious.

You could talk about how the idea of someone only becoming gay because their friend is just that special is unrealistic, problematic or even truly negative for queer people or what have you, 'cause plenty of straight people have also had fears of being 'turned'. It's not as if queerness is actually contagious. But I don't really care about that angle, personally. Even though technically you could also solve this by calling your 'not gay' character 'queer'. Maybe it just hasn't been long enough for that usage to truly permeate and disperse far and wide enough to be broadly acceptable and accessible in fiction, although it seems like an out gay man living in the US like Ryan would be up to date with the umbrella usage of 'queer', even if he hasn't heard of demisexuality. I was actually a bit amazed a jock like Stefan even knew enough to consider his own asexuality. That's way further than most of these stories go, even in actual published LGBT fiction.

It's funny, 'cause there's definitely times demisexuality doesn't work as a label, and you should try for gay or bisexual. For example, with John Watson, given how repressed he is, yeah I'd still go for bisexual. It's one thing for a man to honestly admit they're not interested in guys that way, generally. (Though it becomes particularly damning if one doesn't generally have intense heterosexual romantic attachments either, like John.) But given that John has been so adamant, so messed up about his relationship to Sherlock... yeah, I wouldn't take any of what he says or perceives about himself at face value. Even if you accept John is actually straight, clearly he's not someone you can just believe to be honest to or about himself. While that isn't an excuse to project anything onto him as a character in an analysis, I'd say it's pretty apparent that there's something going on that he's repressing. Specifically about Sherlock. And well, demisexuality isn't about repression; it's more like a way to explain how some people may genuinely only like one person 'that way' and not dozens or hundreds, or what have you.

In *that* sense, I agree that labels are certainly tricky things, and ought to be used responsibly. You shouldn't just apply them willy-nilly, or assume they explain individual complexities where they only barely hint at them. I mean, in my opinion, the word 'gay' includes the full spectrum of behavior and attraction from hyper-sexuality to asexual homoromantic people (and more). At the same time, this breadth means any given label can't predict or explain all the aspects of a particular individual, necessarily. That's not what labels are *for*, anyway. Of course there are things there are no labels for. I mean, you could always make some, but they're certainly not always necessary. That's true.

But it's maddening to me how often characters (and people in real life) will have this conversation, like in Bromosexual, where either someone goes for the obvious or demisexuality and bisexuality are both more or less hand-waved away. I mean, I understand that demisexuality is an obscure idea, so I'm not very surprised or particularly upset about it. But bisexuality gets the same treatment in the media, and that *does* upset me. Bi erasure is real. There's enough public awareness of bisexuality that ignoring or dismissing it as a useless label it is *obviously* purposeful on some level. Or at least, whether or not a given writer meant it that way, this would still be part of a general social trend towards erasure. It's not some innocent, abstract concern about naming things that don't need a name. No, because bisexuality has a name. And it's dismissed and suppressed because people are uncomfortable. Even bisexual or otherwise queer people. And, you know, that's not OK. That's prejudice.

Anyway, I will admit that a lot of times it's awkward. A lot of people genuinely aren't comfortable with overly concrete things or into self-reflection. That's a personality quirk I'm definitely aware of. There are certainly well-meaning people with that personality quirk. There are other writers like Maggie Stiefvater, who wrote LGBT books with sympathetic and genuinely realistic portrayals of characters who're truly unlikely to use the word 'gay' at a certain point in time, let alone jumping straight to declaring themselves bisexual. However, these writers, no matter how well-meaning and realistic, are also being privileged by the people in power in society who're uncomfortable with queerness in general or bisexuality in particular. And I will also admit that many times, stories that do use labels are very self-conscious or self-important about it, and realistic characterization often suffers. I've seen plenty of explicit bisexual representation that worked for me, but I've only read one novel or fic with a believably self-aware demisexual character (Santino Hassell's Concourse). It's hard to do well, and I don't think it's always necessary; the Raven Cycle is a good example of a series that worked great without any labels.

I just think it's worthwhile to make that effort more often, that's all. I'm not a person that's particularly political about it, or insistent about seeing a certain kind of 'representation' by far. Still, how Stefan feels does have a name. Stefan is absolutely a bi demisexual. He's not the only one like that. In fact, he's a lot like me. And well, it'd be nice to have that acknowledged in the story. It would be nice to go all the way with bi and ace representation sometimes.

[choking-on-roses]

if you can't relate to a gay man because he experiences sexual attraction, you're a homophobe. that's all it is. you prefer an asian mlm to not be sexually attracted to his fiance. that's homohobia. that's racism. you're not slick pal. When you bounce between writing gay men having BDSM sex and desexualizing them, all you're doing is recreating the dichotomy of mlm being seen as sexual deviants and desexualized, censored men without agency or desires of their own.

Alright, normally I’d just delete this and move on because it’s clear that you aren’t interested in trying to understand me. But, for the benefit of some of my followers, I’m going to try to explain this as clearly as I can.

1. “if you can't relate to a gay man because he experiences sexual attraction, you're a homophobe.”

no. not being able to relate to people who experience sexual attraction does not make me a homophobe. It makes me asexual. Nowhere did I say I can’t relate to sexual attraction because he’s a gay man. 

2. “you prefer an asian mlm to not be sexually attracted to his fiance.“ 

Welp, have I got news for you about real asian people who are asexual and do exist and can still be in loving, committed relationships. 

To be even clearer, I like to headcanon all sorts of characters as ace, regardless of race. Yes, I understand the stigma around Asians being seen as sexless, and i definitely don’t agree with it. But that doesn’t mean you need to hypersexualize a character just because they’re Asian. As I said, actual Asian people can be ace and that’s totally fine and okay and doesn’t mean they don’t deserve loving relationships if that’s what they want.

3. “When you bounce between writing gay men having BDSM sex and desexualizing them, all you're doing is recreating the dichotomy of mlm being seen as sexual deviants and desexualized, censored men without agency or desires of their own.”

This is hilarious to me because I’m gay. Also, I’ve only written one fic for the YOI fandom so far- it’s right here- and I’d love for you to take a look at it and see if I’ve done either of these things you just said.

Can you find receipts on my blog and ao3 profile? most definitely. I’ve had a long, hard journey learning about queer identities. But i try my hardest to learn and grow and try to write my characters with as much respect as i can. I make mistakes, yeah. But i certainly will never make the mistake of mistaking an asexual person for a homophobe just for headcanoning a character they like as ace, regardless of if they are or aren’t in canon. a headcanon is a personal fantasy you chose to adopt. It doesn’t have to reflect the real material. I think you’re getting really confused about the difference, tbh. Which, on that note, I totally have to agree: based on a canon interpretation, he probably isn’t ace. 

but that doesn’t mean that if i chose to personally headcanon him as such or write an AU where he is ace, that it makes me a homophobe. Please be more careful when you sling that word around, okay?

[inceptionbigbang]

The day has come! The Second Round of Fic Claims for the Inception Big Bang is here. It's a second chance for you to work on any fics that you missed on the first round, and a chance to take on a secondary project.

Claims will work on a similar way to the last round, but we will give priority to fics that haven't been claimed and to artists that couldn't get any of their choices on the first round.

Fics have different numbers for my own organisation, to separate the rounds. Make sure you send the right numbers!

Without further delay, here they are:

21. When dreamshare is first developed, no one has totems. They've always gone into dreams for short amounts of time and always with another person, so there's no chance of someone forgetting their reality. Mal's friend Pip has consistently been pushing the boundaries of dreaming, and one day she decides to go a later deeper without Mal. When Mal wakes up, she realizes that Pip is still asleep and she has to go down after her where she basically incepts Pip with the idea of totems.

Gen

General audiences

No content warnings apply

.

22. Arthur is a flight attendant. Eames is a passenger.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up – Mature

No content warnings apply

.

23. Arthur learned a long time ago that he was special, and no else could see the strings.

Or, ‘everything is still the same, but Arthur can see Red Strings of Fate’ AU.

There are moments when Arthur thinks he needs to tell Eames about the strings. Owes him the truth, he thinks, Eames deserves to know. Other times – well.

Eames knows enough, and he has secrets of his own. Arthur is allowed this one.

Maybe someday it will come up on Sunday brunch, or something.

“Oh yeah, by the way, I can see red strings that I’m pretty sure are tied up to being literal soulmates and we have one. Get it? Tied up hehe. Anyway, no pressure or anything. Love the sex.”

Yeah, Arthur, that would go lovely.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up – Mature

No content warnings apply

.

24. Eames on vacation after inception and stumbling upon Arthur; floppy haired, tanned and just completely the opposite of how Eames has ever seen him before.

Hawaii looked good on him, no better than good...

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up – Mature

No content warnings apply

.

25. When Eames first moved to America, he was at a loss for things to cook. He wasn’t used to the supermarkets and ingredients he needed were expensive. So he Googled food bloggers and found Arthur’s blog. The weekly updates keep Eames going in his boring office job. It takes him a few months before he gets the courage to comment but it’s all downhill from there. Eames is lost with Arthur’s sardonic commentary and when Arthur’s next recipe is one Eames requested, he knows he’s in bad.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up – Mature

No content warnings apply

.

26. Arthur and Eames meet as trust fund teens in a Manhattan private school. Eames is a new student who's just moved from overseas, and him and Arthur hit it off immediately. Friendship turns to a whirlwind summer romance, until Eames is forced to move back to London. They meet again many years later when Arthur has to kidnap Eames for a job.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up

No content warnings apply

.

27. Arthur is in love with Eames, and he's pretty sure Eames is at least interested in him back. Only problem? Arthur is ace, and not at all sure how Eames is going to react to that. But Arthur's going to talk to him about it, because the alternative is to lose even his friendship with the forger, and that's just not on.

Only the team is also determined to set the two of them up. Will that end up being a wrecking ball to Arthur's fragile attempts at making things work with Eames?

STORY OUTLINE:

Arthur is ace, and no one knows. When Eames invites Arthur to join him for Christmas, Arthur panics and says no - and spends the whole of Christmas regretting it. The team comes back from Christmas break, and everything is awkward. Arthur knows he has to say something or ruin his relationship with Eames forever, and he's going to do that at the New Year's party where Eames will hopefully be in a good enough

But unbeknownst to him, he's not the only one who's realized something needs to happen. Cobb, Ariadne and Yusuf agree that an intervention is in order. And when better to set their two friends up than at New Years? Get them kissing and surely the tension between them will resolve itself.

What could possibly go wrong?

At the New Year's party, Ariadne suggests playing a game of spin the bottle. Arthur is less than enthused, but Cobb and Yusuf both back up the idea. They play a few rounds before it lands on Eames, whom Ariadne dares to make out with Arthur.

There's an awkward beat before Eames moves to do it. Arthur reacts by freezing and shying away physically. Eames takes this a rejection and leaves the room. Arthur sits there, frozen, and then leaves too.

He goes to the bathroom and breaks down, blaming himself for being so stupid and backwards. Eames hears him, and comes in and comforts him. Once Eames realizes what the problem is - that Arthur is ace - he promises Arthur that it doesn't matter to him, he just wants to be close to him. Cue happy end credits.

Arthur/Eames

General

No content warnings apply

.

28. A songfic featuring Aubrey by Bread, studying Arthur and Eames and what their relationship might have been like before the Fischer job. The characters aren't going to resemble fanon (Arthur's closed-off persona and Eames's flirtiness). I'm going to try to expand more on what Nolan gave us during the movie (Arthur's straightforwardness and Eames's aloof/cold personality). Basically, Eames is distant and Arthur chases.

Arthur/Eames

Side: Dom/Mal

Teen and Up – Mature

Graphic Depictions of Violence*

* There might be a torture scene, but I'm still debating on whether or not I want that in the story.

.

29. This is an academia AU! Arthur is a struggling young professor trying to find his niche, Eames is the mysterious colleague he keeps (inadvisedly!) hooking up with at conferences.

Arthur/Eames

Mature

No content warnings apply

.

30. A fic about arthur and eames and their first meeting in the military to all their other meetings in the criminal underworld of dreamshare. not that long, i'm aiming for 2.5k or maybe 3k if i can. i wanted to focus on their totems and how eames could use forging as a totem (because if he can't forge then he must be awake, right?) but he has a totem just in case. and arthur has a totem (the die from the movie) that he uses a lot more except when he happens to be taken and tortured for some secret or another and the only thing that convinces his brain that he isn't dreaming is the way eames stands when arthur aims a gun at him? if that makes sense....

here's a little bit of what i have written so far:

he’s more surprised at the lack of surprise he feels when eames digs a poker chip out of his desk. its blood red with gold and white accents, worth five thousand dollars at the particular casino it came from, disregarding the fact that it was arthur’s shitty first and last attempt at a real world forge after he participated in a poker game eames held on base many years ago and realized half the chips in the set were fake, pocketing a one thousand dollar chip to use as a reference.

“our totems match,” eames murmurs, flipping the chip over his knuckles with a concentration a bit too intense for something he could do in his sleep (ha).

“match how?” he asks, sipping a glass of orange juice, freshly squeezed because eames wanted to use the electric juicer. he's tempted to pull out his die from his pocket and roll to see it land on five, even though he knows this isn’t a dream.

“i have something that you made, and you have something i made. also, there’s some significance with the number five.”

Arthur/Eames

Side: Dom/Mal

Mature

Graphic Depictions of Violence*

*I put the Graphic Depictions of Violence just to be safe but i think it's less than what's shown in the film? because it's supposed to be like an after-torture scene where arthur is like "ouch i'm super hurt and drugged and don't know if i'm dreaming" but again i don't think it's any more graphic than the film at least. might keep that tag just to be safe though idk

.

31. There was a small lake behind Arthur's house. The following night, he sat at its edge and stared at the moon's reflection in the water.

See something you like?

Arthur turned. A man was sitting next to him.

"Hello," Arthur said. "Thank you for helping me get home last night."

The moon smiled. "How did you know it was me?"

Arthur rolled his eyes. He picked up a pebble and tossed it into the water, watching the waves ripple the reflection. "How can you be here and there at the same time?"

The moon leaned back on his elbows and stared up at the sky. "Same way I can be in the lake and the sky at the same time."

Arthur frowned. "That's not the same thing. The lake's just reflecting the light from the moon. From you."

The moon turned to smile brightly at him. "Well aren't you a smart one, hm?" He leaned in and whispered, "I'm a reflection, too. We all are, at the end of the day."

Arthur thought about that. It didn't make sense, but that didn't mean it was wrong. He looked up at the moon in the sky, then at the moon sitting next to him.

"My name's Arthur," he offered. "What's your name?"

The moon looked at him strangely. "Eames. You can call me Eames."

"I'm going to be an astronaut, Eames," Arthur said. "Then I can come and visit you in the sky."

Eames smiled again. Arthur wouldn't have thought the moon liked to smile. "I would like that very much," Eames said. "Very much, indeed."

Arthur/Eames

General – Teen and Up

No content Warnings Apply

*This fic is a canon AU and will ultimately include the events in Inception.

.

32. It’s a follow up story to Cat Person.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11040948

First story summary:

Arthur misses his cat and would very much like to get another. He gets Eames instead.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up

No content warnings apply

Set in the Star Trek Universe

.

33. Haunted House AU. Arthur’s working at a popular horror maze escape place to make some extra money over the summer. It’s far from his dream job—making minimum wage crouching behind dark trap doors and chasing random couples and tourists—but at least he gets to vent his frustrations about his coworkers (who are, frankly, driving him insane day by day) by literally screaming at customers. Then there’s Eames, who finds haunted houses boring, overrated, and not the least bit frightening, but is willing to humor a friend (Ariadne?) by accompanying her. But an encounter (and some painfully obvious flirting) with the cute guy under the ghoul mask is enough to make him want to come back again, and again, and again—

FEATURING:

- Cobb as the owner/boss and the only guy who actually takes his job seriously. He probably squints a lot because sunlight genuinely hurts his eyes lmao - Mal as his wife, who used to be an actress but left to start a business with Dom. Super sweet and kind of protective of their employees. Plays the main ghost. She’s terrifying. - Yusuf doing their costumes and makeup!!!!

- Arthur getting the job in the first place because his screams are so full of rage (let! him! rest!)

- Eames blowing all his cash on haunted house admission fees so he can flirt with Arthur (who plays different roles on different days, maybe? but Eames can always recognize him, even under the masks/makeup)

- he’s not trying to be creepy, he just wants to ask if he can see him outside of work/get his number—but something always goes wrong before he can

- Arthur being frustrated because Eames is a) distracting, and b) not easily scared, which doesn’t look good for his job. And it annoys him because he has a track record of being able to freak out anyone. He takes it upon himself to make him scream at least once (I haven’t decided how he does, but he does, eventually. Eames probably jokes about screaming with something other than fear, but i am too babey to write any sexytimes)

- maybe??? mild h/c?? Dumbass Drunk College Students coming in all wanting to prove to their friends that they're the Alpha Male, picking a fight and being super violent/rowdy/destructive, + arthur getting hurt/generally kind of shaken up; that’s the first night he lets eames really talk to him outside of the job, maybe even lets him take him home (i dont know if im including this scene for sure but..perhaps)

- Ariadne getting them banned from the haunted house after reflexively slapping Arthur in the face with a rubber snake (Cobb takes the ‘no touching the actors’ rule seriously—especially after what happened^). Eames thinks he’s lost his chance for good, but Arthur finds him outside and finally makes the first move :)

Arthur/Eames

General – Teen and Up

No content warnings apply

.

Ok folks, the next fics are or may eventually get explicit. Minors, we love you guys! Stay safe.

.

34. Arthur is an undercover narcotics officer posing as a high school senior. Eames is his teacher, who is taken with Arthur and who feels terrible for lusting after a student. Arthur takes down the bad guys, saves Eames' life, then they smash (after Eames finds out he's a fully grown adult person).

Arthur/Eames

Explicit

No content warnings apply

Eames is (shamefully) interested in Arthur, who he thinks is 18 and also his student.

.

35. Summary: Eames hasn't seen Arthur in almost four years.

Pseudo- Winter Soldier AU.

--

There's no response from Arthur, no recognition in his eyes. No banter, no teasing – a coldness that would leave any lesser man with severe frostbite.

"... Arthur?" The words sound so raw, so gutted in Eames’ mouth. "Are you-" are you alive? Are you dead? Am I dreaming?

He reaches for his poker chip.

But before he can trace the ridges for the familiar grooves, a shot rings out loud like a crack of lightning.

And the last thing that Eames sees is Arthur and how he always remembers him: in his whip-black suit and a smoking gun in his hand.

Bang.

A single bullet tears through Eames' temples, and he is ripped open, pain lighting every nerve in his body like a pinball machine – and he prays to god that this is merely a dream so he can finally wake up.

Arthur/Eames

Mature – Explicit

No content warnings apply

.

36. Pre-movie: Dom and Mal are a dominant/dominant couple who want to find a sub they can play with together. Arthur is interested in trying to fill that role.

Arthur/Dom Cobb/Mal Cobb

Mature – Explicit

No content warnings apply

BDSM, dominance/submission, bondage, spanking/flogging, roleplay.

.

37. Arthur has a goldfish which, long story short, he has convinced himself he only needs to keep alive to prove he is not a hot mess. Except now it’s not looking so good and has a weird sore on its side and he doesn’t know what to do but he can’t just let it DIE. So he takes it to the vet and is scoffed at and told it is a feeder goldfish, they cost less than a dollar, just get a new one.

Two vets later and he’s at the end of his rope when he meets Dr Eames, whose dog is introduced as his PA and goes on all his rounds with him. Dr Eames doesn’t even question it, just starts the exam and tells Arthur to pet the dog and start at the beginning while he works.

Arthur/Eames

Teen and Up – Mature - Explicit

No Content warnings apply*

* Discussions of parental death.

.

38. “Taxiing an injured delivery boy around the neighbourhood to help him complete his remaining orders had not been a contender on Eames’ list of potential scenarios for the night. Instead of the morose teenager bleeding onto the synthetic leather of the passenger seat, and the short stack of pizza boxes sliding to and fro across the backseat, the Brit had rather imagined his rental car would serve far more nefarious purposes tonight." -- Essentially, Pizza Delivery Porn Guy Crack A/E AU. Aim: comedic tone with bowchikkawowow.

*Arthur isn’t the teenager. He is a customer who ordered pizza.

Arthur/Eames

Mature – Explicit

No content warnings apply*

*There is mention of a traffic accident - no detail, but it might not be someone's cup of tea. Also, not yet at the sexual scene so don't know whether I'll stop at M or go to E.

.

39. Eames is working with Arthur the first time in a long while, only now it seems that he has a huge crush on Arthur. He doesn't know how else to get rid of the crush and he really can't concentrate on the job when he's thinking about Arthur all the time, so he asks Arthur to have sex with him, to get the crush out of his system. Arthur agrees surprisingly easily and sex is great, but afterwards Arthur doesn't seem happy and Eames' crush is worse than ever. The more Eames tries to get rid of his crush, the more it sticks, and the less Arthur is talking to him. After the job, Eames has some time to think and he realises that maybe neither of them really wanted for him to get over Arthur. He goes to see Arthur to talk to him about it, but they end up kissing and stuff as well.

Arthur/Eames

Mature – Explicit

No content warnings apply

.

40. In the court of the vampire supreme Saito, ambitious human noblemen Eames and Arthur battle for the coveted position of favorite bestower. Winner takes life everlasting.

Arthur/Saito

Side: Arthur/Eames

Arthur/Dom Cobb

Eames/Saito

Explicit

Graphic Depictions of Violence

Bloodplay, Extreme Sadomasochism. Possible Necrophilia

.

If you've got any questions, send them our way!

[theculturalvacuum]

A Dance with Fan Fic Ask Round Ups

I have a confession: I was a little terrified that everyone would be mad at me for going to a cliff hanger with the groom storming out to a pretty unrelated chapter involving middle-aged ladies and repression, not least because it took me two months to get it out. But the feedback on this chapter has been so sweet. Thank you.

Now that the next chapter is out, I’ve finally decided to catch up on all of these….

Anonymous said:

I don't think your buying into stereotypes with your dornish women, they aren't all identikit, they're all just reflective of a place which expects women to be a bit more involved in everything. From outside of Dorne you've got Sarra who was assertive in her own way by telling eliott how to behave with his new wife, it was a gentle type of assertiveness but she took control and had that conversation no matter how awkward. Lady Darklyn too certainly seems not lacking in confidence.

Well, good. I sometimes worry about women who are less assertive and how they cope in this society. With Sarra, what I was more going for was more encouraging her son to be gently assertive about his marital rape license.

Anonymous said:

Elliot, you are my sonion, and I understand that you're upset, but you're acting like an asshole. Stop being an asshole.

I’ll pass this on, but I’m not sure El will be able to hear me over the sound of his raging hangover right now.

Anonymous said:

Your fic is so much fun, I find myself going yeah oh poor Eliott's he's going to marry a whore, and then im like, wait what the fuck corret man. I get so into each chapter that by the end of it im agreeing with these twits. that's when I know im hooked and your good at your thang.

Thank you? POV bias is a bitch, though.

Corret has a very logical brain, and he’s very normative. He just doesn’t question the assumptions of his society. And he didn’t say Loree was a “whore”! He said she was “little better” than one. Big difference, dude!

Anonymous said:

A few ask rounds ups ago, someone mentioned Dylan having high hopes that Ellaria Uller will get a prominent job in KL, oh my god I need this. I need Corret to just have no clue what going on and why is buddy would want such a thing when he has a second son to put those hopes onto. Maybe Dylan thinks Ellaria is his cleverest kid or something and he's excited of her progress report from the water gardens/tutors at Hellholt or something, and Corret is just so uncomprehending.

Lil’ Ellaria aces all the math tests.

I can’t think of any reason why Dylan would stop hanging out with his old buddy Corret or why he wouldn’t be one of the famous Dornish Proud Papas.

Anonymous said:

Hey my Jeyne Swann love is perfectly reasonable and normal!!! Sorta. I just feel bad for her she went to a place where she could have done anything (within reason) and shiteros had screwed up her view of herself and marriage and life so much that she was never able to take even one second of advantage of it then she got a disgusting growth in her body and died. I feel much better now and zen knowing that she as some fond times with her girls to give her happy memories as she wasted away.

I’m sure she thought she was the luckiest woman in the world.

Anonymous said:

I kind of feel sorry for eliott and how unprepared he is for the world he's walked into. I mean there are limits to my sympathy given his attitude and his opinion on stuff, but if someone (ADWIN!!!!) had just given him a few more facts from the start or they'd journeyed through Blackmont and he'd been able to see Meria and Simon and have a little chat with him, it wouldn't have fixed everything but he'd have at least been more like a good little scout and been (a bit) prepared.

I mean, Adwin threw a pile of books at him. Was that not enough?

Eliott’s problem is sometimes connecting theoretical knowledge to the real world. He can know things about Dornish culture, or even that some historical Princess So-and-So had half a dozen paramours in her life or something, and still not have it occur to him that it would apply in this situation.

Anonymous said:

Something I sort of noticed as the Rowan caravan was journeying was they never stayed anywhere where there was a marriage like Eliott was about to enter into. Manwoody, Fowler and Vaith there is no spouse in residence, Allyrion the dude is the Lord, so everywhere they went of the big houses he's not getting the chance to really see the role he'd have which probably keeps the shackles on for even longer.

I suppose that’s true, I didn’t plan it or anything. But the most important thing keep the shackles on is Eliott and his Brain Virgin. I’m not sure if swinging by Sandstone would have helped him much except maybe that he would think that Allin ain’t a real man or something.

Anonymous said:

Given everything that happened between AWiS and the present, would it be fair to say that Edgar Yronwood was right, or at least had a point when he said that the Martells trying to win the favour of the Northerners wouldn't yield the result they wanted? A bit rich coming from the man who backed the Blackfyres, but still...

Well… ask Elia how it all worked out. Though, to be fair, the amount of autonomy they seemed to have under Robert is a little ridiculous.

Anonymous said:

I'm excited and sad for the upcoming Alysanne chapter. Excited because she's a brilliantly written character; sad because she's spent her whole life getting shit on and thanks to patriarchy brain, thinks it's all her fault. Which makes me sad.

I feel guilt about how long it took me to get this round-up out. Like, that was two chapters ago… I hope it lived up to your expectations.

Anonymous said:

On your favourite subject of Jeyne Swann, whats the age gap between her two girls? did Allyster try and get two kids on her relatively quick so they'd be able to stop making appointments? Must have been a bit weird for her not to have anyone pushing for the her to birth the prodigal penis, even with huge amounts of pb that must have been kinda nice, even if she did probably think she'd failed or some crazy shit like that.

The gap between them is maybe five years or so, and Jeyne (the younger) didn’t marry as early as Rebanna did, so her kids are quite a bit younger than Maron. There may have been some infant mortality between them, or even after as well. I’m not sure, I don’t want to pile on. Allyster stopped making appointments because he could tell how not into it she was, and that got weird after ten years.

Anonymous said:

why is alyse ladybright not tagged for your fic? she appears plenty and yet the poor Lady doesn't get a tag.

Ha. I think I only tagged people who already had tags.

Anonymous said:

Is Lewyn's paramour someone we've already met in a AWiS? Jennelyn Sand mayhaps?

No and no.

Anonymous said:

If Casson had married Loreza would that mean that Ellaria would have been Lady Vaith one day?

I suppose so. Unless it prompted Vanella to bite the bullet and get hitched.

Anonymous said:

Speaking of trophy consort, I always thought he'd be younger but not young enough to be her son. More in the vain in your fic verse of Emerik Qorgyle or Trebor Jordayne if he wasn't heir. that way he's very much a man grown when they marry and has plenty of life experience so he has something to offer as a ocassional advisor. But he's still a younger hottie too.

Okay.

Anonymous said:

I like owain a lot. He seems like a real good guy. Plus he's got Tully links too which makes him dynastically well linked along with his Reacher and married Martell links. Alyse is going to be all over that, but I imagine there might be a queue.

Owain is the pragmatic one. Marq is a mini-Corret with all his ISTJ-ness. Lymen is the racist one. Jon the Green is also there. Maybe he’s the funny one.

Yeah, Eliott’s peeps aren’t as cool as Loree’s.

Anonymous said:

I have sympathy for Jeyne Swann lover anon because I'm actually drawn to your background characters more than your POV's. I like all your POV choices and they're a nice spread but its the unknown with the background characters that interests me. I like Deria, Deneza is someone I really wish for more of, Adwin's a professor in another life, Owain is just perfect, Sarra/Aelora are just the cutest, I need more Dylan, Simon Leygood's life intrigues me even if he's only a name, Alyse is a dream.

Alyse has dreams.

Anonymous said:

How do Rebanna and Allyster feel about the fact that Maron is almost 30 and not married? I get that the Dornish don't push marriage as hard as some, but they still do succession through bloodlines. Would the fact that he hasn't married make them question if he's responsible enough to rule Wyl?

Well, he had his heart broken once.

They’re probably in Wyl right now talking about how they’ll totally bring it up as soon as he hits thirty. Also, keep reading.

Anonymous said:

Does Lenelle have ladies-in-waiting, or is that a right reserved for Martells proper? Similarly, does Jenny have ladies, or is her status low enough, and scandal that she caused great enough, that no knight or lord wants his daughters to serve her?

Lenelle does have ladies of her own, I just haven’t really thought about who they might be or had cause to mention them. Emelyn was one, once upon a time.

I have no clue about Jenny. She would probably ditch them if she did have them.

Anonymous said:

This is a bit of a random comment but I loved your response to my asking about where the Fossoways were. It just highlights how different peoples minds work. once I read who the groom was on the Dramatis personae my first thought was who were his cousins on the other side of his family and thought they must be young or female for him not to have any of them as his little group of companions. When I saw none were there I just immediately jumped to conspiracy theories like a normal person...

I mean, we can weave a tale about how Sarra doesn’t get on with her family ever since they found out that she doesn’t like apple pie, or something.

Anonymous said:

Besides GRRM, who would you say the biggest influences on your writing are?

Jane Austen is kind of obvious. Especially in the dialogue, probably.

Actually, Martin doesn’t influence my style nearly as much as I would like him to. My descriptive passage are always very, like, functional.

Anonymous said:

Whether or not it occurs in on page, I'd imagine that, at some point during the events of AWiS, some Reach Bros got drunk and decided to loudly sing The Dornishman's Wife. They couldn't understand why their Dornish hosts didn't find the song amusing.

I think their Dornish hosts just find it dumb. And it will be quite the wedding feast, I’m sure. Literal wine fountains.

Anonymous said:

Will AWiS feature anything like Martin's weirder, trippier passages? Either a character having a fever dream or ingesting a hallucinogen of some sort?

I’m not sure if I’m up for that. I did once write a dream for Eglies, though.

I’m not sure which pov character is most likely to eat a magic mushroom. Probably Ormond.

Anonymous said:

Aside from Loreza being dornish and set to be ruling Princess of Dorne, I can't help but feel like anther problem Eliott may encounter with her is she's very much a grown woman. Whereas there seems to be so many really young brides elsewhere, some criminally young but even 19 year olds like Olenna haven't really lived, they're in a lot of ways children in women's bodies due to the way they get infantilized. Loreza isn't any of that and that is a new experience even before the political stuff.

I think that’s quite insightful. And Loree has this confidence about her sexuality that I don’t think Eliott will know what to do with.

Anonymous said:

Love Deria, she sounds like she has a bed warmer and wants to find someone for her new friend, lol.

Deria’s a classy lady. She doesn’t kiss and tell.

Anonymous said:

I volunteer to kill Tybutthole, it would be my pleasure, I'd even pay you for the honour. As realistic it is, I hope there can be something positive to come out of this even if it only sadly Marigold getting out.

I suppose that all depends on how you define “positive outcome”. As I believe I’ve said before, this society is tailor made for men like Tybutt, but I think Alysanne is starting to realize that that may be problematic, so I would say not all hope is lost.

Anonymous said:

Princess Trystana and Lord Gargalen totally seem like marriage goals for the setting. they've found a way to function as a couple, communicate and raise their kids together with respect and support.

I mean, maybe they seem like that now. You should have seen them in the old days.

Anonymous said:

Daenella seems kind of Targ to me, like she inherit all the privilege like a Martell has but without any of the dutiful nature that goes with it, which seems Targ-ey. By the time she was born her dad was gone/or almost, so her mother had to help Rhodryn in his new role, and child bearing problems and grieve and adapt so Daenella probably just got to have all the fun of being born into such great position but without any of the lessons in duty.

All the best royal families have that “only two kinds” thing and in the Martells’ case it the whole “hot and cold” thing I made up for The Princess and the Septa. It was kind of, like, institutionalizing the contrast between Doran and Oberyn, (a contrast so obvious that even GoT noticed it...) And Daenella is kind of this generation’s Oberyn. Though, so is Arion, so…

But, of course, the sharp contrast is also an oversimplification. Like, which one is Lewyn, for example?

Anonymous said:

Linette!!! nice to hear about her a bit. I wonder if a tiny bit of Duran's appeal to Alysanne, as she gets to know him better, if his obvious pride in his daughters, and the fact he's ''satisfied'' with them.

Tiny bit?

Linette’s a pro. She has charts.

Anonymous said:

Daenella and Trystana seem like they just don't understand each other at all. they try in their own ways to connect but they're so different that the other just doesn't see these overtures as being meant to be kind or loving. Little Trystana might momentarily unite them when she's probably likely to be born at the most inopportune time. They're sisters, they clearly care for one another they just have no clue how to communicate with each other.

Anonymous said:

The princess of the breeze seems to bring the worst out of her sister. I think Trystana just has no idea how to relate to her, and as she's so used to being in control and knowing what she's doing she can't quite function as she wants to around her sister and they just end up having this escalating back and forth, that Trystana seems to know if ridiculous but can't quite break the cycle.

Deanella always has the best intentions for things, but she just gets overwhelmed by her emotions and can’t focus on things enough to actually follow through. She wants to be a good mother and a good sister but… omg, that dog has a fluffy tail! No one sane would trust her with any actual responsibilities.

And Trystana is very dutiful, but she also wants to make sure everyone knows how dutiful she is. Specifically that she’s more dutiful than Daenella. That being said, she would drop everything to help her sister in a crisis, even after the twentieth time.

Anonymous said:

Whilst I'm enjoying the little romance Alysanne has going on, I'm particularly enjoying her simple joy at having people notice her and making a few new friendships and how she just seems to spill to these people because she's probably never had anyone to really talk to for years aside from her daughter, and you can't tell you child any of this sort of stuff. I could see her and Deria becoming great friends, and Trystana too if Alysanne's world continues to open up.

Female friendships are important for women.

Anonymous said:

Someone needs to engineer ''accidents'' for certain assholes so that Daisy and Marigold can be left the fuck alone.

Anonymous said:

LMAO, Alysanne thought she was in for an earful and instead she was being set up with her dreamboat again. Honestly when this is all over however it goes or doesn't go she's going to need a good neck massage from all the whiplash she's getting trying to get her head around all these dornish ways.

Those mysterious Dornish ways of, like, consent and stuff.

Anonymous said:

On a scale of 1-10, how concerned should we be for Alysanne's safety? Tybutt doesn't seem the type to take his wife showing agency lying down.

If Tybutt gets on Trystana’s wrong side you should be more concerned for his safety.

Anonymous said:

Trystana girl, you looked in the mirror lately, Daenerys is wilful? lol. Maybe their wilfulness comes out in different ways but they've both got bucket loads of it. I did enjoy her chat with Alysanne in general though, she likes her husband and wants him to have some happiness and joy. the fact the lady he likes is the biggest sweetheart that ever sweethearted is a big bonus though.

How dare you! Dany is nothing at all like Trystana!